So in my early years the church was a big part of my life. My Grandmother was very involved and by extension my family was. After I was born I even lived in an apartment owned by the church and was raised there for a little while. I was "baptized" UU and the church was part of my life until I was about 11-12.

I'm 33 and just getting back in, but in a different part of the country. Over the years I've forgotten a lot and would like to reconnect with my faith and raise my children in it, but I've been to a couple services and I don't care for it.

The first presentation I attended was some pretentious writer reading from her memoirs about her struggle to save her boyfriend's family farm and get it recognized as protected land. My wife and children are native and I was so embarrassed listening to this woman talk about how after 4 generations it was a travesty they might lose their huge patch of land without a single mention of the suffering that made that land fall into their hands in the first place. She had given us enough context to understand she was from settler blood as well and when she said, "I could feel my ancestors rejoicing for us saving the land." I could about feel the soul leaving my body. Then she read us like 4 pages about buying a fucking car. It was awful.

My third visit was a sermon from a guest Minister. She seemed nice enough, but she basically gave a whole sermon on labor justice, liberation, and equality without a single honest criticism of what it is about our society and economic system that makes these things rampant. Nothing meaningful said on class or on the history of the labor movement. She made it seem like if immigrant produce pickers were given the protections and pay that most American blue collar workers have that that would be that. No more exploitation. No reason to think past a system that has benefited her tremendously and has caused untold suffering through war and imperialism. She wrapped this sermon up in revolutionary language and even added a nice white washed quote from a black revolutionary artist.

If I start on my first meeting with the Social Justice Group I'll be dropping like three more paragraphs about how problematic that was.

I say all this to ask if this is an experience you all are having? How do I reconnect with my faith when the church is so right wing? How do I get past the performative, white liberal, bullshit? Why have the politics of the church not expanded left of liberalism, especially since it's absolutely not compatible with our principles?

Thanks. I know that some of you may feel a little called out on this post and I'm genuinely sorry.