https://substack.com/home/post/p-157730601

The Pew Religious Landscape Study 23-24 is out. Unitarians and other liberal faiths ("Unitarians, those who volunteer their religion as “spiritual but not religious,” deists, humanists and others") are at 1.1% It was 1% ten years ago, and 0.7% in 2007.

UU was initially described to me in very humanist terms. I was told that all beliefs were accepted and that the shared beliefs were things such as the basic dignity of each person, building of community to support each other, social justice, etc.

I was particularly told that atheists were a large portion of the congregation.

This sounded great to me, so I attended a UU service today. I was a bit surprised to hear nearly every part of service containing religious elements. For example, I heard the following religious elements:

• God
• A divine spirit
• Prayer
• Sins

Given that UU is accepting of all beliefs, I of course expected religion to some degree. I guess I was surprised to hear the extent of it, particularly if Atheists make up a large portion of the congregation.

What I want to know is how other Atheists handle religious elements in service? Do you simply ignore these religious elements? Do you try to adapt the religious elements to your own beliefs? For example, I heard another UU member say to simply replace “God” with “science”, but I would honestly struggle to make that replacement and some concepts like “sins” seems hard to find a replacement for. Or do you relate to these religious elements in some other way?

Hey all. I have been UU a long while, in and out of attendance for various reasons, but I've finally found "home". This church is everything I ever wanted--people are kind, genuine, compassionate, and there are so many social opportunities for people of all ages. My partner and I are looking to membership right now but we'd like to know more about membership dues and what that looks like. I know I'll be fine to have this conversation with the minister, but I'd like to have a more candid conversation about dues and it feels disrespectful to discuss with him. Can I ask what they look like for you? What is it based on? Am i reporting my salary to the church? My partner was raised baptist and they expected 10% of your household earning--something we definitely cannot support. What happens if you want to leave?

So I consider myself UU, but also a small-u unitarian and universalist. Today I was talking to a Quaker chaplain who was raised UU and went to Starr King School for the Ministry, and I mentioned that I believe in God, and he remarked that I might be the first UU he's met who believes in God. This made me laugh, but it also got me wondering how common monotheism is within UU, so I thought I'd post an informal survey on the topic, and I'd love to hear other people's perspectives in the comments.

View Poll

I'm putting together a small group experience considering the new Values and Covenants

Do you have a link to an audio or video of a sermon on a single Value, e.g. a sermon entirely about Equity or entirely about Generosity? Please share the link

(In the context of the small group, I just want to share the link so people have a voice outside of our small congregation to print their thoughts. It would be a suggested extra, not a part of the sessions.)

Thanks for your help!

Love, justice, equity, transformation, pluralism, generosity, interdependence

Where should I go?

Hi, I believe in God and I am a universalist. Both a universalist in the sense that I believe God is hidden into all tradtions, but also in the sense that I believe in universal salvation.

I respect y'all and wish nothing but the best to y'all, but our vibes don't match (which is fine). For example I have no problem with rainbow people overall in life but I am personally very heteronormative and I also don't care for most of the liberal activism and agendas that tend to be associated with y'all. This is not criticism and I don't try to tell y'all to stop, I just personally don't care for most of the stuff in UU and my values are kinda pseudo-conservative. I don't say this to troll, but to give a background.

I love talking with Christian Universalists (not referring to Unitarian Universalists of Christian background, but to the ones that are exclusively Christians Universalists) and their vibe is the most like mine, but I am not a Christian so it doesn't work.

I was wondering if anyone has any recommendation for a "less liberal" or "more strict" tradition kinda similar to UU in the idea of universalism (both in salvation and in pluralism) and an idea of God more in the Abrahamic tradition rather than Eastern philosophies? 😁 I know it is a funny question but I have searched for a spiritual community/religious tradition for over 10 years and have not come across anything even close to my wishes.

Thanks! I thought that people here might know something. I know Quakers, but what else?

It's really weird to consider myself becoming a church person because I was not raised with religion. I went to youth groups to hang out with my friends but the religious stuff was just kind of a weird background thing I never fully bought into, and actually stopped going after one day where a woman kept telling me Jesus loves me. I thought that was creepy and lost interest. Been to church a few times if grandparents wanted to go or if there was a fun event or something but never regularly. I'm just agnostic and always have been. Some general spirituality too.

I came across a comment online where someone said if you're looking for community or a way to get involved with activism, join a Unitarian Universalist church. I looked into it and found out there's one in my city. So this is embarrassing but I didn't know people can just go to church service they're not a member of. I instead was the only attendee at an information session with the minister and one other person to discuss what it means to be a member. I was happy to see that it really is so welcoming and liberal, they have a bunch of committees focused on different social issues. I looked back at the themes of some past services and they look really...soothing? Or motivating. My boyfriend is going to attend with me too and it will be a way for us to get involved with helping community. I especially have been feeling lonely and overwhelmed by current events, and desperate for some kind of connection. Actually have been saying for a while that I wish I was religious so I could go to church. I didn't know being religious isn't a requirement 😂 the minister of mine is a gay atheist!

Do you have a lay pastoral care team? Please pass along this training opportunity and consider joining us yourself! Join us for all this Saturday's all online Pastoral Care Training, 10am-3pm ET. Our trainers will be sharing tools for grounding & presence to help care for ourselves and each other in difficult times. Get all the info and register here: Embodied Pastoral Care for a Liberated Community https://sanctuaryboston.breezechms.com/form/50e0df (via Sanctuary Boston, reposting from Facebook)

I’m curious if anyone else’s UU church has seen an uptick in aggression towards your church?

Our building was vandalized, we’ve had aggressive and threatening phone calls, and we had someone come into our church last week and start asking political questions.

Do you have safety and security teams at your church? What steps are you taking to make sure everyone is safe during this time?

it is disappointing that almost all of my responses to your questions on my previous post - which at the moment has an 82% upvote, but was locked - have been removed.

it was and is not my intent to defame UUA, but to call for us to take action in addition - on what I see as a a crisis which is going to prevent us from doing anything substantial about human rights for many years.

there is a lot being done in the secular groups in which i am involved that i don't see here, and i think UUs have a ethical and humanitarian viewpoint which could bring a lot to the movement. i would certainly welcome support in arguing that view from my religious movement. i am in a place where i am in an overwhelming minority, in a congregation where most of our friends, neighbors, and families want something better and are blindly hoping for it while completely not seeing the destruction.

Over a decade ago, in the spring of 2013, Rev. Sofía Betancourt, who is now UUA President Rev. Dr. Sofía Betancourt, signed the Change petition which called upon the candidates for UUA Moderator and Board of Trustees to publicly indicate their willingness to start a new national conversation on clergy misconduct in the UUA, and to ensure that survivors of misconduct have a real voice in that conversation.

Asked them to commit to using the powers of the Board to take ownership of the recommendations of the Safe Congregation Panel, to update them as needed, and to hold the staff accountable for implementing them fully.

And asked them to investigate the accountability relationship between the Board and Ministerial Fellowship Committee, with an eye toward balancing the need to protect institutional interests with a pastoral responsibility to care for victims of misconduct.

Both candidates for UUA moderator endorsed this UU Safety Net initiative to reopen the clergy misconduct conversation.

Jim Key posted this on his website and Tamara Payne-Alex has posted this on hers.

But that promised National Conversation On Unitarian Universalist Clergy Misconduct never actually took place, and UUA Moderator Jim C. Key aka Risk Management consultant James 'See No Evil' Key, and the UUA Board of Trustees, proceeded to minimize the extent and seriousness of clergy sexual misconduct, and officially deny any sexual abuse of children by UUA clergy, in a dishonest, and thus worthless, UUA Board 'official apology for clergy sexual misconduct' that Jim Key inappropriately inserted into the middle of his first Moderator's Report during the 2014 UUA GA.

In signing that petition, Rev. Sofía Betancourt wrote, 'This is part of right relationship and respect for the inherent worth and dignity of every person. I am confident that we can have this challenging conversation in a loving way as a movement. It is time.'

If it was time for a National Conversation On Unitarian Universalist Clergy Misconduct in 2013, it is a dozen years overdue now. So I invite UUA President Rev. Dr. Sofía Betancourt, the UUA as an institution, all UUA ministers and UUA congregations, indeed all Unitarian Universalists, to participate in a National Conversation On Unitarian Universalist Clergy Misconduct that begins now, continues for at least one year, and results in a new UUA official apology for all forms clergy misconduct, both sexual misconduct and non-sexual misconduct, that will be delivered jointly by both UUA President Rev. Dr. Sofía Betancourt, and the UUA Board of Trustees, during the 2026 General Assembly of the Unitarian Universalist Association at the latest.

I’ve been going to my local congregation for a short time but I feel so strongly that I belong. Everyone has been so welcoming - so many people know my name. My church has a membership “journey” and I’ve hit all of the milestones.

Once a year, at the end of February they have a celebration and recognition of new members! I’m so happy and excited to officially be apart of my congregation.

I postes recently and had a wonderful response from y'all about fitting in with UU.
I went to a service today and oh my gods was it perfect. Our reverend gave a sermon on beauty and how important it is to recognize it, especially in times like these.
It was meaningful, productive, and exactly what I was looking for. I filled 4 pagea of my notebook with quotes and thoughts and insight! Thank you all for your advice, I'm so glad I went! 💜💜

Hi everyone! I'm planning to go to services in the Tahoma Congregation, and I was just wondering if anyone has ever been. I grew up UU but I haven't regularly attended in a while, and I was hoping to return in these trying times.

may 2012 i got this shit (paraphrased)

bikini season is coming up. you might want to wear a bikini or short skirt to fit in, with your bffs or win over a guy. but holy modesty will make you happy, not worldly peer pressure. why? leave two candies outside for an hour. one unwrapped one in the wrapper. the one in the wrapper will stay pristine and pure. the one that follows lyrics of rappers will be covered in ants and flies. yuck! (the other girls laughed) you're not increasing your value by showing off, you're cheapening yourself. let them think you're uncool or a prude by dressing modestly, their opinions don't change that they're giving themselves to flies who would gladly leave them if they smell a piece of dog doo. you staying pure, you'll be a woman happily married to a man, not a bunch of flies.

still makes me mad. not only is that saying i'm nothing but a mass produced lump of high fructose corn syrup. guys you yes YOU should be even more offended. purity cultures saying you guys have less self control than a damn bug.

and mad at the hypocrisy. this is california. guys walk down the street shirtless if it's over 60 out not even close to the beach yet no one cares.

thank goodness for owl not doing that

I’ve been reading about the group a little bit, and I’m wondering what their concept of paganism actually is.

I consider myself pagan-adjacent. I’m very pantheistic, pretty interested in Neo-Druidry, and certain pagan myths and themes are a big influence to me — but I tend to be much more naturalistic and physicalist (though non-reductive) than what I associate with paganism. I’m certainly no polytheist, and it’s questionable as to whether my idea of “God” really amounts to theism of any kind.

However, reading on the CUUPS website, it’s not really clear that polytheism is really a requisite feature of paganism in their eyes. So I was wondering what y’all’s experience with the group might be. Is it pretty exclusively polytheistic neo-paganism? Or do they include the more generally nature-centered side of things like Druidry as well?

i haven't found my pantheon, but i lament how many polytheistic and animistic religions christianity coercively wiped out (times it was non coercive are different). for some reason the idea of a pantheon just sits right with me. but honestly i really like even just the very idea of the world having one more person in modern times whos not just irreligious but actually believes in and doing rituals for many gods. is that valid reason to want to be polytheist? but right now i'm effectively irreligious going to a christian college bcoz i got my best scholarship package there. but i want to believe in a pantheon. somehow i want to believe and not be just another atheist. even if i am pretending to be christian anyway so the super christians on campus don't give me guff, i'd rather believe in a pantheon than no gods.

I've occasionally attended the UU Church in ny town. The reverend is nice, the community is welcoming, the building is beautiful, and the sermons are always meaningful.

As a queer, pagan(ish), autistic, mid 20s person, I'm used to having trouble fitting in, and usually it's obvious why. But I just can't figure out why I feel like I don't fit in here. So far it feels like a mix of being one of the youngest 10% of the congregation and being the only gender non-conforming person there. I feel like a zoo exhibit occasionally and while I appreciate the support, sometimes the extra attention to 'welcoming' me goes too far.

I also feel like my church doesn't 'big talk' enough. They talk about how everyone is and make so much small talk, even from the pulpit, but there's not enough talk about divinity, theology, self improvement, spiritual / religious growth, community support, etc. And when there is, its almost always from a christian perspective.

Am I alone in my complaints here? I feel like the odd one out every time I go.

What I believe Unitarian Universalism should be about

Making UUs better, more thoughtful, open-minded, and understanding people

Link to post online

by David Cycleback Ph.D., the British Royal Institute of Philosophy

1st Principle: The inherent worth and dignity of every person

4th Principle: A free and responsible search for truth and meaning

A Unitarian Universalist congregation serves various roles for its members. Some seek community amongst like-minded people, some a Sunday morning refuge from the outside world or an education program for their kids. Others join for social justice and activism.

As a freethinking, pluralist tradition, Unitarian Universalism should, at its core, teach its members open-mindedness, curiosity, and how to engage with diverse ideas and perspectives. A church or belief system should promote spiritual and intellectual growth by broadening perspectives and deepening knowledge and understanding.

This means offering classes, sermons, discussions, and programs that explore different religious and secular belief systems, cultures, ideas, and viewpoints—including those that challenge our beliefs, assumptions, and prejudices.

The Spiritual Destructiveness of an Increasingly Politicized and Politically Narrow Church

One of the greatest intellectual and spiritual challenges to UU is the increasing politicization of the church and the narrowing of perspectives. Though founded on independent thinking, many congregations have become politically and ideologically narrow and sometimes even intolerant. The Unitarian Universalist Association (UUA) now resembles a mirror image of a politically conservative Evangelical church. A church is not supposed to be a political party.

This makes critical thinking, open dialogue, and understanding differing viewpoints more essential than ever.

Political hyperpartisanship harms a church, creating a spiritually poisonous us versus them mentality. Many UUs who claim to value open dialogue and understanding abandon those principles when it comes to politics. People are often at their intellectual and emotional worst when engaged in partisan politics and this mindset should be discouraged in a spiritual center. I have seen otherwise thoughtful, kind, and open-minded UUs mischaracterize, defame, and make no attempt to understand people simply because of differing beliefs and backgrounds.

Echo chambers must be countered, as they promote an illiberal, close-minded mindset. A free and responsible search for truth cannot be confined to a single ideology. To claim that truth can or should only fit within one ideology—political, religious, or other—is both arrogant and obviously false.

These days, dissent and heterodoxy are critical to the health of the church and congregations and to preserving liberal religion. Those who promote groupthink and partisanship and suppress heterodoxy should not be in leadership positions.

The Importance of Critical Thinking

UU congregations should teach their members critical thinking skills. Even if most members of a congregation belong to the same political party, being able to intelligently assess diverse ideas is crucial for thoughtfully engaging with the diverse world. All UUs should learn how to recognize cognitive and cultural biases and irrational thinking, practice intellectual humility and understand the limits of our knowledge, identify logical fallacies, and impartially consider diverse perspectives.

With today’s tribalism, a common read for a UU congregation could be social psychologist Jonathan Haidt’s The Righteous Mind: Why Good People Are Divided by Politics and Religion. This book explores how and why people arrive at different moral and political perspectives.

Honoring the Worth and Dignity of Everyone Through Knowledge

One of UU’s core principles is the inherent worth and dignity of every person. To me, this is the foundational principle of the church, and why I support UU congregations working to be welcoming to people of many identities and backgrounds. However, unlike what UU does these days, truly respecting the dignity of others means listening to and learning about all people—not just those “who think like us."

Too often UUs learn about different racial, ethnic, and cultural groups through a narrow progressive lens and from just a tiny partisan subset of the groups, when the people within those groups hold a wide range of views and experiences. This does not create understanding—it reinforces existing biases and ignorance. If we only see others through our own ideological framework, we are not respecting or even trying to understand them.

A Better Vision for UU

Critical thinking, open-mindedness, curiosity, lifelong learning, and meaningful engagement with diverse and challenging perspectives are essential not only within UU congregations but in life beyond them. These skills, which UU should be taught in their congregations, transcend religious affiliation and are vital for navigating a diverse world.

UU congregations have the potential to model a more open, inclusive, and thoughtful society—one that values honest discourse, respects differing viewpoints, and seeks understanding over division.

This, to me, is what Unitarian Universalism should be about, and is the only Unitarian Universalism I am interested in.

Hello again. Thank you for all of the great suggestions for evening programming on my last post! I’ve had a couple people in my local community recommend organizing a series of talks around creating a mutual aid network of some sort. The truth is that I am very new to this concept. I am curious if any of your congregations have organized mutual aid groups or efforts in your community, and what that looked like? Just trying to brainstorm right now. Thank you!

The Self-Righteousness Problem in Unitarian Universalism

As with other religions, many UUs are self-righteous

by David Cycleback Ph.D.

Link to original post

“It's not a secret that UU is a magnet for eccentric people and also a magnet for self-righteous people.”— a Unitarian Universalist congregant

“I thought UUs were supposed to be different, but they can be as self-righteous as Mormons.”— a former Unitarian Universalist

Unitarian Universalism (UU) is a belief tradition that prides itself on inclusivity, open-mindedness, and a commitment to social justice. With its roots in classically liberal religious thought and pluralism, UUism presents itself as an alternative to dogmatic, exclusionary religious faiths.

However, despite its emphasis on tolerance and open-mindedness, Unitarian Universalism is not immune to the human tendency toward self-righteousness. In their dedication to justice and progress, some within the UU community develop a sense of moral and intellectual superiority that can alienate those with different backgrounds or who do not fully align with their perspectives. This issue, while not unique to UUs, risks undermining the very values the faith seeks to uphold.

The Nature of UU Self-Righteousness

For some Unitarian Universalists, self-righteousness manifests as a rigid adherence to progressive ideals, an intolerance of differing viewpoints, and a tendency to view ideological opponents as morally deficient. Many UUs see themselves as having transcended the narrow-mindedness of more conservative religious traditions. While their commitment to social justice is commendable, it can sometimes result in an exclusionary mindset in which those who question certain doctrines are dismissed as ignorant, regressive, or even immoral.

This tendency is evident in political and social discussions within UU congregations and forums. Because most congregations lean strongly leftward, more conservative perspectives—whether political, theological, or cultural—are often marginalized or even silenced. While UUism champions the principle of a “free and responsible search for truth and meaning,” in practice, this principle is often applied selectively. Those who express alternative opinions on complex social issues may find themselves ostracized rather than engaged in open dialogue.

Psychological and Social Factors

Several psychological and social factors contribute to this dynamic. One key factor is confirmation bias, where people seek out and reinforce information that aligns with their existing beliefs while dismissing contrary perspectives. In UU communities, this can create an echo chamber effect, where members continuously reaffirm one another’s views without exposure to meaningful dissent.

Another contributing factor is moral absolutism disguised as relativism. While UUs often claim to embrace a plurality of beliefs, there is often an implicit assumption that progressive values are unquestionably correct and morally superior to others. This can lead to virtue signaling, where people publicly express their commitment to justice and inclusivity—sometimes more to reinforce their moral standing than to foster genuine dialogue.

Additionally, tribalism and group identity play a role. Like all social groups, UU congregations foster a sense of belonging and shared identity. However, this can sometimes result in an “us versus them” mentality, where those outside the group—especially conservatives, traditionalists, or skeptics of certain social justice ideologies—are viewed with suspicion or disdain. This contradicts UUism’s commitment to radical inclusivity and respect for diverse beliefs.

In recent years, Unitarian Universalism has also become increasingly politically narrow, limiting the range of perspectives within its congregations. The influence of the Unitarian Universalist Association (UUA) and UU seminaries has further reinforced this narrowing, as many ministers are trained in a doctrinaire form of progressive activism. Ironically, some of the most rigid and dogmatic voices in UU spaces today are activist ministers who embody the very close-mindedness that UU is supposed to challenge.

The Consequences of Self-Righteousness

The self-righteousness problem in UUism has real consequences for both individual congregations and the broader movement.

• Alienation of Potential Members – People who might otherwise be drawn to UUism—such as moderate liberals, independent thinkers, or spiritual seekers—may feel unwelcome in an environment that appears ideologically and politically rigid. This dynamic can contribute to declining membership and a shrinking diversity of perspectives within UU congregations.
• Intellectual Stagnation – When dissenting voices are discouraged or suppressed, intellectual and spiritual growth suffer. UUs pride themselves on being lifelong learners, but true learning requires engaging with challenging and uncomfortable ideas. If congregations become echo chambers, they risk losing the intellectual humility necessary for real wisdom.
• Erosion of Compassion and Empathy – Self-righteousness can weaken the very compassion and empathy that UUism seeks to embody. When people become convinced of their own moral and intellectual superiority, they may struggle to extend genuine understanding to those with different beliefs. This can lead to performative activism rather than meaningful engagement with complex ethical and social issues.
• Separation from Wider Society and Communities – A culture of ideological purity can isolate UU congregations from the broader society, including communities they seek to support, such as marginalized and minority groups. Many religious, ethnic, and working-class communities hold diverse perspectives, including traditional values that may not fully align with UU progressivism. When UUism takes an approach that implicitly or explicitly dismisses these perspectives, it risks becoming disconnected from the very people it claims to stand in solidarity with. This insularity weakens UUism’s ability to build meaningful interfaith and intercultural relationships.

Overcoming the Self-Righteousness Problem

Addressing self-righteousness within Unitarian Universalism requires a conscious effort to cultivate true openness and humility.

• Encouraging Ideological Diversity – Congregations should not only tolerate more conservative or moderate viewpoints but actively seek to understand them. Spiritual and intellectual growth and understanding different peoples and cultures require engaging with differing perspectives, not just those that align with progressive ideology.
• Cultivating Intellectual Humility – Recognizing that no one has a monopoly on truth is essential. UUs should model humility by engaging in respectful debate, asking questions rather than making assumptions, and remaining open to changing their minds when presented with compelling evidence.
• Revitalizing the Free and Responsible Search for Truth – This foundational UU principle must be applied consistently across all areas of life, not just those that align with progressive activism. Congregations should create spaces where difficult conversations can happen without fear of judgment or exclusion.

A couple of years ago, and after experiencing a devastating series of personal losses, my partner and I decided to seek out both spirituality and community via a local church. But being more progressive than not, and an interracial couple in our 40's, that ruled out a lot of churches. But after some light research, we agreed that our local Unitarian Universalist or "UU" church might be a good fit as it seemed more liberal than conservative. However, after attending services for roughly 8 months and joining a potluck group for several, we ended up having a set of experiences that left us deeply unimpressed with the culture of the/our UU church, making our decision not to become members easy and obvious.

To further explain, during the very first service we attended, we were thrilled to hear abortion referred to as healthcare, but dismayed by the utter lack of diversity or the demographics of the congregation which skew almost completely elderly (65+) and caucasian - despite being right next to a medium-sized (135k population-wise) and very diverse city. Nevertheless, recognizing the truth of MLK Jr's words about Sundays at 11 am being the most segregated time in America (but why the age issue?), we agreed to be open-minded and continued to attend services.And while we enjoyed the music and found the lifespan or children's director's sermons simply joyful as he tended to focus on both self-awareness and resilience, we found the actual minister's sermons lacking. For, they were so focused on "social justice issues" or what we could do/should do for others, the idea that we (and others for that matter) might also be in pain/looking for more inner peace or coming for spiritual sustenance ourselves seemed to get lost. Instead, we listened to what felt like superior/condescending sermon after superior/condescending sermon about either "educating" (conservatives) or "supporting" others (POC/LGBTQ/Immigrants).

Worse, coffee hours meant that we were also forced to contend with the various members' "social justice" preoccupations. For instance, one especially obnoxious member (the Blowhard from here on out) who clearly viewed himself as an "activist" (as opposed to the clueless and self-righteous volunteer/retiree he actually is) kept approaching us about the issue of voter rights for folks convicted of felonies. And while we would vaguely decline to get involved, I regret not asking him (or any of these very old, very caucasian, and very middle and upper-middle class UU members) if they'd had ANY personal and/or professional experiences with convicted felons. Because, unlike them, I have. A lot. Both personal and professional. As a result, I know that felons don't generally tend to be very civic-minded, something that MIT's political science department has confirmed by tracking voting patterns for convicted felons still allowed to vote in both ME and VT. And given the opportunity to vote - while still in prison even - they have overwhelmingly opted not to. Hell, only 64% of Americans voted in the 2024 Presidential election, so what made the Blowhard so sure that the majority of felons, of all people, are so desperate to vote?!

My guess or sense based on experience? He, like many of these old and caucasian "liberals" had never really been around folks convicted of felonies, and certainly not many folks unlike themselves in terms of both race and class. And, as a result, he was incapable of really reflecting on this issue in a grounded way. Nor had he been able to develop any true instincts for social justice work or a sense of what efforts might be more meaningful than not. Instead, he'd just hopped on a bandwagon despite his lack of knowledge and very much fueled by his obvious self-righteousness. And without realizing it, he kept announcing both with his cringe-inducing virtue-signaling about this - and other issues. So much so, that we came to loathe seeing the Blowhard approach us yet again. Especially as I personally like to focus my own efforts on protecting a woman's bodily autonomy or raising the minimum wage, things that could have actual impact - beyond making white liberals feel good about themselves.

And then the Israel-Palestine conflict flared yet again in 2023, and my partner and I witnessed these elderly "liberals" demonstrate that they're not so liberal after all. For not only did we sit through sermons that pandered to the Jewish members in the congregation, we also had conversations with UU members who clearly thought themselves to be on the progressive side of history - while being Pro-Israel! So you can imagine how unsettled they seemed to be upon learning that we - like much of our generation - do not view the conflict the same way. I guess hoping they'd learned from their contemporary, the incredible Jimmy Carter, was too much to hope? Anyway, after enduring one too many sermons and conversations that reflected this generational divide, we were done attending services and coffee hours. For we realized that while UU'ers may be liberal for their generation, that does not make them especially liberal in ours. And certainly not in the generation below ours. What's more, we consistently detected a deep defensiveness (versus genuine accountability or even just curiosity) about their church's utter lack of diversity in terms of age, race and class. This of course means that they are then utterly unwilling to wrestle with the impact of that lack of diversity or the fact that the church serves as an echo chamber. An elderly, white and middle class echo chamber. And UU'ers can do their cutesy identification of their pronouns at the altar or lectern, but that kind of liberalism is ultimately just performative - just as the "empathy" behind it is conditional as it doesn't ultimately cost one anything to practice. But recognize colonization, apartheid and genocide? Or, God forbid, openly wrestle with your own privilege and resulting cluelessness about...So.Many.Issues? That didn't seem to happen during our time in UU land.

But now we felt stuck as we'd joined a church potluck group and even volunteered to act as conveners for the group. Ugh. (Between our weekly donations and now this, we were starting to feel like our church was taking a whole lot more than it was giving.) We nevertheless decided to honor our commitment and forged ahead. But when we went to look at who we'd been paired with, we were dismayed to realize we’d not only been placed in a group of people ALL a couple of decades older than us, but that we'd also been paired with the Blowhard! Not wanting to spend our time with him, and wondering about our ability to find much commonality and connection with any of the other retirees at a very different life stage, we decided to be brave and ask for what we wanted versus complaining about what we weren't getting. So we reached out to see if we could be placed in a more diverse (age-wise anyway as, again, our church offered almost no racial diversity) group, citing the fact that we still worked full-time and couldn't meet on the Friday evenings the rest of our now retired group preferred. We were then met with what felt like an inexplicably defensive/rude response from the potluck organizer who delivered a condescending lecture about respecting/enjoying our elders and trying the group we'd been placed in before opting out. Worse, we later learned that this organizer had gossiped about our request, making us even less impressed with the culture of our church - and w/ her later apology for her rudeness (though not for her poor boundaries). Nevertheless, we still felt an unfortunate sense of obligation (we're both working on that tendency in ourselves, btw!) and carried on-something we also came to regret.

First off, it quickly became clear that two members were not in positions to host (being in retirement homes) while another one (the Blowhard!) was an anxious/poorly prepared host and asked to meet at restaurants before and after hosting just once. Secondly, and more importantly, by only a couple of dinners in, we realized that absent one lovely man and one lovely woman, our group of 7 elderly UU'ers was filled with personalities very similar to the Blowhard's. Meaning that they seemed to be fueled by the exact same off-putting self-righteousness which is in itself fueled by 1) insecurity 2) a lack of knowledge and 3) a desire to appear superior.

So the insecurity would show up in that they'd be very self-promoting about their various volunteer efforts (always dressed up as "activism") which was beyond tedious. The lack of knowledge would show up just as it had with the Blowhard's voting rights push, but also in relation to things like what was driving the conservative vote (authoritarianism, not just a lack of education as they'd incorrectly posit) or by stating that my immigrant partner's relatively homogenous home country was "diverse" because he, well, seemed "diverse" to them by virtue of being a POC. And the desire to appear superior was especially apparent as the self-promotion would prompt competitiveness which would then prompt rude questions and dismissiveness about one another's efforts, experiences and connections. For instance, when my partner mentioned that I grew up as a minority in my hometown's school system, we were both amazed to witness zero curiosity about this (minus from the one lovely man in our group) but obvious competitiveness/dismissiveness instead. As if some weird desire to be the most "woke" of all was at play. It was exhausting. For we now felt like these people who'd both grown up in very homogenous places and settled in very homogenous places, nevertheless expected to be recognized as something they simply aren't: Sophisticated critical thinkers on issues having to do w/ gender, race and class. And the final two incidents that caused us to leave the church altogether proved that in spades.

First, during one especially awful dinner, the Blowhard engaged in sexist mansplaining that involved him asserting - to a table filled with women who've never had a member of their own gender represent them as President, and have now watched two qualified women lose to an utterly unqualified man accused of rape not once but twice - that racism is more pervasive than sexism. And what happened? Not a single one of these so-called "activists" pushed back on that assertion. Instead, he let out a thoroughly dysregulated shriek of "What?!" when I conveyed my gut-level response to his mansplaining with an almost involuntary scoffing sound. Yet, there was no guilt. No remorse. No concern that he'd made a sexist or even an offensive comment. Had he or anyone bothered to further inquire, I would have reminded him and them that sexism exists in every culture while homogenous cultures experience less racism. But his sexism and his rudeness - and the permission they granted him to be both - shocked me into silence.

Next, and during our final potluck, the Blowhard actually took the opportunity to center himself, an old white man, in a story having to do with women’s safety in the world. And, again, not a single one of those so-called "activists" pushed back. In fact, his one female friend even egged him on! Of course, she'd already proven the psych concept that like attracts like. For, like him, she was more than slightly ridiculous in that she too identified as an "activist" as opposed to the reality: someone who'd failed to launch a true career, but was privileged enough to be a sort of volunteer/protestor - just one with a blog that screamed, "look at me"! And I write this as someone who has had a career working on behalf of abused women and children for most of my adult life, but would never identify as an activist because I've worked alongside true activists and know the incredible price they have and do pay, both practically and emotionally. So listening to her, well, brag about getting arrested at various protests, while not recognizing that she has the luxury of being arrested w/out any fear of losing her livelihood (among other things) was beyond grating. To give this even more context, she and the Blowhard had actually interviewed one another about their various volunteer efforts for their little town newsletters in order to feed their mutual self-importance. So I suppose it's a small wonder that the UU principles don't seem to even consider the evil of deeply-rooted sexism, something especially shameful considering who just entered the oval office. Maybe because some of these privileged UU'ers seem to have just woken up to the reality of racism in 2020?! So is sexism and classism simply too much for them to contend with?! Will that start next year then?

Finally, my partner and I do of course appreciate that not every UU church is like this one. But we also wonder how many there are that are exactly like this one as we found the culture deeply depressing and the exact opposite of what we needed in terms of commonality, connection and community after surviving painful losses. And we've since agreed that if a church attracts a certain kind of demographic (white, elderly, middle to upper middle class) and then a certain kind of personality (self-righteous), it has to both cater to and reckon with both. But, from our view, the church is simply failing to ask people to look inward as opposed to only looking outward. And in doing so, it is also failing to recognize that the Unitarian Universalist church doesn't just have a diversity problem. It has a self-righteousness problem.

Hi there, I live in an area where it's hard to find any UU community/groups that are not online. I really have fallen in love with what I have seen from the UU community, and I have wanted to be a part of it.
So I guess what I am asking is, can you still be a UU without being part of a physical congregation?

Hi everyone! I have been asked by my congregation to help vision and lead an evening fellowship program. Our congregation is comprised of mostly older folks, and therefore a lot of the fellowship programs happen during the day.

The main goal of an evening program, as I have interpreted it, is to act as a stepping stone for families/working people in the community who may be potentially interested in the UU church, but may be hesitant for one reason or another to attend a service. I lead a lot of community programming in my personal life and for my work, but I’m trying to come up with a way to not only make this appealing to younger people, but am also trying to reflect on what sort of social gathering is needed right now?

I do think people are seeking connection in a safe place. What will draw in those seeking a progressive and thoughtful spiritual community? It seems wrong to think of it from an ‘advertising’ point of view, but there’s a lot to compete with. People already have a lot on their plates, what sort of evening activity would offer something unique or different from what they may find elsewhere? I’m not trying to complicate something simple, but would love to hear some of your thoughts.

In a few weeks, I will be leading a discussion group on the topic of "Democracy." As part of that discussion, I am currently intending to have the group engage in a collective thought experiment which will involve (in part) imagining what the ideal presidential candidate would look like from a UU perspective. Yes, I know that the vast majority of UU's would have preferred Kamala Harris over the person we have now, but even Kamala (or Hilary or Bernie Sanders or ....) could have been improved on. So, what would the ideal presidential candidate (or president) look like for you?

In case you are curious, I will be asking this question as part of a strategy to tease apart the notions of "democracy" and the Democratic party. At our last meeting on this topic -- at the end of November -- some (quite vocal) members simply conflated "democracy" with the Democratic party. This is of course quite understandable given the context. Yet, they are not at all the same thing and I think it is important to separte them if we are to have any serious philosophical discussion on the topic.

More specifically, I am wondering if some in our group (perhaps myself included) would have voted for someone with authoritarian tendencies if we perceived these tendencies (maybe suppression of dissent and concentration of power) as being for what we saw as the greater good. The idea would not be to say that these inclinations are "wrong," but to use them as a way to think about what democracy really means for us and what tensions might exist between our notions of democracy and our notions of the common good.

hey just wanted to ask around and see if there where any groups of branches of uu that focuses on nature based spirituality and if so what are they like

Edit 1: Thanks for all the feedback - it's exactly why I came here to discuss this. I completely agree that legal consultation is essential. I may have a connection through my UU congregation who could help provide initial guidance.

I want to clarify my intent: This isn't about excluding anyone. We specifically want to protect and include medically vulnerable residents. We'd absolutely welcome and accommodate those who can't be vaccinated for medical reasons. The goal would be that having all medically-able residents stay up-to-date with CDC-recommended vaccines would help create a safer environment for those who can't be vaccinated.

This would aim to safeguard our most vulnerable community members - whether they're immunocompromised, transplant recipients, undergoing chemotherapy, or families with young children. But you're absolutely right that we need legal expertise to ensure we structure this appropriately and comply with all applicable laws.

I'd appreciate any resources or examples of how other communal living spaces have successfully navigated these considerations. Thanks again for helping me think this through more carefully.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

TL;DR:

We're proposing a health safety policy for our community to enhance resident safety, including required vaccinations (COVID-19, Influenza, Pneumococcal, Hepatitis A & B, Tdap), testing, and clear quarantine guidelines. Despite pushback from the housing board—who see the pandemic as over, fear lawsuits, and have anti-vaccine residents—I believe these measures are crucial to prevent illnesses like shingles, the flu, and COVID-19.

Some UU friends have mentioned the 4th Principle ("A free and responsible search for truth and meaning") as a reason not to get vaccinated, but I feel that Sunday services or someone's own apartment/house are different from shared communal housing. Your feedback and advice are welcome.

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Hello everyone,

I'm reaching out for feedback on a proposed health safety policy for our UU intentional community. Our goal is to enhance resident safety and well-being while respecting privacy and addressing the nuances of our shared living environment.

Current Safety Measures:

• Infrastructure: Recently paved driveway, well-lit hallways, secure hand railings, and handicapped-accessible ramps.
• Pest Control: Effective trash management.
• Building Safety: Fire procedures and property insurance.
• Food Safety: Refrigerators at 40°F and mandatory handwashing before food preparation.

Activity Restrictions:

• No pets in the residence.
• No firearms or weapons allowed.

Proposed Health Safety Requirements for New Residents:

Vaccinations (per CDC guidelines):

• COVID-19 (primary series + boosters)
• Annual Influenza vaccine
• Pneumococcal vaccines
• Hepatitis A & B series
• Tdap (Tetanus, Diphtheria, Pertussis)

Testing and Notification:

• Agreement to get tested when symptomatic.
• Prompt notification of positive test results.
• Clear quarantine guidelines when ill.
• Masking in common areas when experiencing symptoms.

Implementation Plan:

• Add requirements to housing materials.
• Discuss during initial tours.
• Provide clear written guidelines.
• Create a reporting system for health concerns.

Why This Matters:

We share multiple communal spaces, increasing our vulnerability to disease transmission. Examples include:

• Preparing a meal while someone uses the laundry for sickbed sheets.
• Checking mail next to someone with an illness.
• Sharing bathroom spaces during cold and flu season.

Regional Practices:

• Nearby universities require COVID-19 vaccination for all students and employees, with exemptions considered.

Public Health Support:

Influenza Vaccine:

• Annual vaccination is crucial, especially in communal living.
• Reduces risk of hospitalization and severe illness.

Pneumococcal Vaccine:

• Essential for adults 50+ and those with certain health conditions.
• Prevents serious illness from pneumococcal diseases.

Shingrix (Shingles) Vaccine:

• Recommended for everyone 50+.
• Highly contagious and potentially devastating in close-living environments.

Additional Vaccines:

• Tdap/Td: Boosters needed every 10 years.
• Hepatitis A & B: Recommended for shared living environments to prevent liver infections.

UU Principles in Action:

Our proposed health safety policy aligns with our Unitarian Universalist principles:

1st Principle: The inherent worth and dignity of every person.

• By ensuring vaccinations and health protocols, we honor and protect each individual's right to a safe living environment, especially those who are immunocompromised.

7th Principle: Respect for the interdependent web of all existence of which we are a part.

• Our interconnectedness means that protecting one person's health safeguards the entire community. Vaccinations and health measures are acts of respect and care for the collective well-being.

Challenges with the Housing Board:

At a recent board meeting, there was pushback from the board. Some members view the pandemic as over, and there are current residents who are anti-vaccine. Additionally, the board is concerned about potential lawsuits for mishandling medical records and violating HIPAA regulations. While I deeply sympathize with their commitment to serving our community, their approach often focuses more on minimizing organizational risk than addressing the genuine human dynamics and safety concerns that shape our daily community life. But I don’t want COVID again, shingles, or the flu.

Some UU friends have mentioned the 4th Principle ("A free and responsible search for truth and meaning") as a reason not to get vaccinated, but I feel that Sunday services are different from shared communal housing.

I welcome your questions, advice, and discussion about these safety measures and how best to communicate with our UU housing board.

Thank you for your input and support!

I'm going to take the UU Institute Coming of Age for Adults: Building a Faithful UU Identity course online this February. It's a free course.

I'm inviting you to also take the course and for us to discuss each module, about one per week. For those whom the time zones work out, we'll do a voice chat.

Here's an invite to the discord. Look for the thread on the #ask-a-uu channel

Hi! I'm a recently de converted Christian looking to try out unitarian universalism. Are there any churches in Boston with congregations in their 20s and 30s?

Hi! I'm a recently de-converted Christian looking to try out unitarian universalism. Are there any churches in Boston with congregations in their 20s - 30s?

Hi everyone, I hope this post is okay—please remove it if it’s not in line with the group guidelines.

I play music for services at Cross Street Chapel in Manchester, and for the interlude, I create improvisations born from silence. Over the past 20 weeks, I’ve recorded these moments and compiled them into an album: Pause for Reflection.

This music is designed for reflection, relaxation, or even as a gentle backdrop for winding down. I hope it brings you a sense of peace or stillness, as it has for me in creating it.

https://aaronbreeze.bandcamp.com/album/pause-for-reflection

Does anyone have the older lyrics to this hymn in Singing the Living Tradition (1993)? We’re planning a memorial service and can’t find the variant that our beloved friend took delight in, the one with: “From what flat wastes of cosmic slime,
And stung by what quick fire”

We tried archive.org for the 1964 hymnal but no luck.

Do we all just have a collective hallucination about singing this? 😆

Is there a CUUPS specific SubReddit I haven’t found one. Or forums else where for that matter.

Jewish UUs: What is your take on the Israeli-Palestinian conflict? Do you agree with the GA 2024 Action of Immediate Witness: Solidarity with Palestinians https://www.uua.org/action/statements/solidarity-palestinians

Context: Our congregation has asked a local Imam to come speak during one of our services (and I am co-chair of the committee who asked him to come). I have seen the Imam's PowerPoint already and am a little concerned that it might be not quite as unbiased as I would like, not that I think what he will be saying is wrong or that the Palestinians do not have more than ample cause for grievance.

I am considering asking the Imam to try to at least say one or two positive things about Israel, or at least make some attempt to present the point of view of the other side, even if this is merely concessionary: "Although Israel blah, blah, blah, blah."

But mainly I am just curious. (FTR: I am not Jewish).

I’ve been a UU for most of my adult life. I have a dear friend who will probably be entering hospice soon.

He is a late 60’s gay man who was never all the way “out”. Always cis appearance and demeanor (so celebrating being out and rainbow flags aren’t appropriate to who he is). He has had a partner for about 25 years but they tended to only tell very close friends. He let a lot of people believe he had a wife. His choice. We are in the South. His partner had been in denial and somewhat avoidant so it’s on me and I’m glad to hold his hand until the end.

He is not religious and will be cremated according to his wishes. He is also having a hard time with memory issues so it can’t be too intellectual, just comforting.

I’m interested in any passages that are comforting for hospice care. Passages to reflect on a life well-lived. Also readings that can ease transition without heaven/hell.

Thank you for any suggestions.

My baptism wasn't my idea it's unfair someone decided to splash me 27 years ago before I was talking and that made the Biblical God the owner of my soul who I don't want to worship. How do I get my soul back so I'm not going to hell?

I just feel like reaching out here. I find that secular humanism fits my values more than Christianity.

But I've found so much meaning in Christianity. With this said, I'm not at peace within myself.

Link to article: "Redux: Why the UUA is Doomed to Fail in Its Goals" by the cognitive scientist and philosopher David Cycleback Ph.D.

Full text of the article reprinted below:

Preface

The following is an old analysis of mine explaining why the Unitarian Universalist Association’s attempts to increase the church’s general and racial and ethnic minority membership, while laudable in intent, are horribly ill-conceived and lacking in common sense, and the church is unlikely to achieve either goal.

I repost it because the UUA published its 2024 UUA Certification Report (click to read) which not only details the church’s membership and financial problems (In the past decade covered by the report, membership has dropped 16% and, adjusted for inflation, pledging has dropped 17%) but also shows that racial minority membership has fallen in recent years. According to surveys of congregations, UU minority membership has fallen from 11 percent in 2008 to an even more paltry 6-9% in 2024. The 2024 report is a treasure trove of information and numbers about UU and its congregations. Clearly, the UUA’s methods are not only not working but making things worse.

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The old analysis: "Why the UUA is Doomed to Fail in Its Goals"

Unitarian Universalism (UU) is a tiny, eccentric, politically far-left, and predominantly white church with dwindling membership. It is far whiter than the United States population and than most Christian and conservative churches, including the Catholics, Jehovah’s Witnesses, the Anglican Church, and Mormons. While UU has advanced from its heterosexual patriarchal roots, the lack of racial diversity has been a source of angst to many UUs who see themselves as social justice vanguards. (UUA 2010) (Braestrup 2017) (Pew Research Center 2015)

Doubling concerns, according to its 2022 report, the UUA has had the largest drop in membership and number of congregations in church history. There are currently the fewest members, religious education (RE) members, and number of congregations ever. The previous pre-Covid census in 2020 showed the largest drop in membership in twenty-three years and the largest drop in Religious Education membership in forty-nine years. (UUA 2020) (Loehr 2005) (Halsted 2019) (UUA 1997)

The current national UU leadership has expressed that it aspires to both increase UU membership and greatly increase racial minority membership by moving UU even further to the political left into extremism. This article explains how these goals can conflict and how the current national UU’s attempts may achieve neither. (Frederick-Gray 2021) (CLFUU 2017)

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UU’s Traditional Culture

As with most churches, Unitarian Universalism has had a particular demographic and culture. UU is associated with its white, Puritan, New England Unitarian roots. Famous Unitarians included Ralph Waldo Emerson, Henry David Thoreau, Susan B. Anthony, Thomas Jefferson, Frank Lloyd Wright, Kurt Vonnegut and Julian Jaynes. The Collegeville Pennsylvania fellowship is named after Thomas Paine.

Martin Luther King Jr. said Sunday at 11 a.m. is the most segregated time in America, with people traditionally tending to congregate with their own demographic. Some racial minorities have said they are drawn to UU’s beliefs but have a hard time fitting in with the dominant culture. One congregant wrote, “I don’t think segregation is intentional. It’s a matter of music, demographics, age, culture, worship style, etc.” (Blake 2010) (Grossman 2015) (8th Principle 2021)

Anyone who attends a UU congregation knows they can have a controlled, insular, polite, Northern European-American culture. As a native of Wisconsin and with many Minnesotan relatives, I’ve commented that the culture of the Seattle UU congregation I attend is “very Scandinavian.” I am neurodivergent (autistic and bipolar) and Sephardic Jewish and from personal experience understand how people who are different can feel frustrated and misunderstood in a UU congregation’s culture.

I agree with the UUA that UUs should work on being educated about different cultures and peoples and how to be welcoming to those who are attracted to UU’s beliefs.

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It’s Not Just Racial Minorities: UU Culture Is Unwelcoming to the Majority in Most Demographics

Usually omitted in the argument that UU culture is unattractive to most racial minorities– and in the mind of some is, thus, “racist”– is the fact that UU is unattractive to most whites. Many outsiders would describe the current UU as a counterculture. I once wrote, “Yes, It is true that UU is unattractive to most blacks. It is also unattractive to most whites, Asians, Hispanics, Middle Easterners, Jews, and every other race and ethnicity. That’s why it’s so small.” My white libertarian friend from Texas would follow the UU’s Principles and is a fan of the Unitarian psychologist Julian Jaynes. He told me he could stand about ten seconds of UU’s brand of identity politics and politically correct language.

I have talked to atheists who I thought might be attracted to a church that has atheists. The majority of the small sample had no interest in joining a UU congregation because they don’t want to belong to any organized church, even one that has atheists and agnostics, and attend services that have a church-like style. Even to these politically left atheists, a “church for atheists” was an incongruous concept.

Many working-class and working-class background UUs have long complained about classicism and vocation/education elitism in UU and UU congregations. This remains. Economics professor and social critic Glenn Loury says that most proponents of the prevailing UUA-style social justice and identity politics are university-educated “cultural elites” who are often out of touch with and even dismissive of white and non-white working-class and poor American cultures and views. (Loury 2022)

A complaint about the recent years’ narrowing of UU’s politics is that it excludes political moderates and conservatives who would embrace the UU’s Principles. There is no political litmus test to be a UU, and there is no reason that many moderates and conservatives who believe in “the inherent worth and dignity of every person” can’t belong to a UU or other religiously liberal church. UU Minister Rev. Sean Neil-Baron put it “We are a liberal religion not a religion for liberals,” and there used to be an active group for conservative UUs. (UUA 2017) (Morgenstern 2020)

I know numerous UUs who have said they wish their congregational membership had a broader political spectrum. Many UUs are rotely dismissive and even openly disdainful of conservatives, often just assuming all UU congregants share their progressive views. A more conservative ex-UU wrote, “I left the Unitarian Church several years ago when I came to realize that it is little more than a liberal-left wing political advocacy group masquerading as a religion.”

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Moving Further Left Makes UU Only More Unappealing to Most Minorities

About fourteen percent of the country is black. It is simply the statistical reality that if every church wants to be, say, forty percent black, that is impossible. UU, in its traditional or current state, will not be the type of church that attracts large swaths of blacks and other racial and ethnic minorities.

In her 2017 essay Where Are We Headed?, UU Minister Rev. Kate Braestrup wrote that UU would have to become more conservative and welcoming to a broader range of political views to attract many minorities who are generally more conservative than UU. (Braestrup 2017)

Pew Research Center polling has shown that the progressive left is only 6% of the United States population, and is predominantly non-Hispanic white and culturally elite (highly educated and economically privileged). Similarly, a 2021 national education poll reported that the “extreme woke” (Those who advocate for the dismantling of society, that students should be taught that whites are oppressors and non-whites are oppressed, etc.) make up 6% of the population and is disproportionally non-Hispanic white and culturally/socially elite. (Pew Research Center 2021) (Sumner 2022)

According to a 2020 Pew Research Center Poll, 65 percent of black Democrats identify as moderate or conservative, and only 37 percent of Hispanic Democrats identify as politically liberal. By a wide margin, whites are the most likely to be in the far left or progressive portion of the Democratic Party. An Indian immigrant told me that he no longer felt welcome or heard in his UU congregation due to his more conservative viewpoints. (Pew Research Center 2021) (Pew Research Center 2020) (Winston 2020)

Taking a variety of fringe political positions unpopular with most minorities, the UUA has called for the abolishment of police and for congregations to quit calling the police. A 2021 national poll showed that only 23 percent of blacks, 16 percent of Hispanics, and 22 percent of Asians support reducing spending on police. Polls over the years have consistently shown that the large majority of all racial and ethnic groups want the same or more spending on police and the same or larger police presence in their neighborhoods. (UUA 2020) (Pew Research Center 2021) (Gallup 2020) (Parker & Hurst 2021) (Hirsi 2021)

Black civil rights leader and Democratic Party Whip James Clyburn said that the “Defund the Police” sloganeering cost Democrats seats in the 2020 election and harmed the Black Lives Matter cause. Los Angeles Mayor and former Congressional Black Caucus Chair Karen Bass called Defund the Police “probably one of the worst slogans ever.” (Brown 2020) (Moore 2020)

The national UU and UU groups have aligned themselves with fringe Jewish groups, such as Jewish Voice for Peace, and movements, such as BDS (Boycott, Divestment and Sanctions), that are out of step with majority Jewish views and even labeled as antisemitic by mainstream Jewish organizations. (McCardle 2016) (Leblang 2017) (ADL 2015)

Multiple national polls have shown that not only are substantially large majorities of all racial demographics against politically correct culture and the politically correct language adopted by the UUA, UU World, UU ministers and many congregations, but the top three in opposition are American Indians (88%), Latinos (87%) and Asians (82%). Seventy-five percent of black Americans were against PC culture and language. (ThinkNow 2019) (Monk 2018)

Black linguist and black-English expert John McWhorter wrote that the term “BIPOC” is unpopular with most racial minorities. A Latino pollster found that “When it came to ‘Latinx,’ there was near unanimity. Despite its usage by academics and cultural influencers, 98% of Latinos prefer other terms to describe their ethnicity. Only 2% of our respondents said the label accurately describes them, making it the least popular ethnic label among Latinos.” Some Latinos have called white people using Latinx “Anglo-Imperialist,’’ “Anglicizing our language,” “culturally ignorant,” and “English speakers imposing their social norms on other cultures.” (Thinknow 2018) (Douthat 2019) (McWhorter 2022) (Cunningham 2017)

Common sense says that a white-dominant church or congregation is not going to attract or be welcoming to most racial and ethnic minorities by adopting unpopular and sometimes even offending language and political positions.

Rev. Braestrup wrote: “Despite our decades of self-flagellating attempts to scour away every vestige of racism from our bleeding hearts, religions that have never made the slightest effort to ‘dismantle white supremacy’ aren’t just more successful at attracting congregants of all colors, they are — according to our own preferred measures — far less racist . . . . The statistics, in other words, strongly imply that anyone who wishes to belong to a non-racist church should depart Unitarian Universalism and join the Assemblies of God. Or– easier still– become a Catholic.” (Braestrup 2017)

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While UUs like to think of themselves as independent thinkers and open-minded, I find them to be as much of groupthinkers and crowd followers as in any religious denomination. UU spaces are often political and ideological bubbles, unaware of or dismissing different viewpoints including from minorities. A UU said that to many UUs multiculturalism means “People who think like us but come in different colors.” I replied, “Multiculturalism means they aren’t all going to think like you, and many will think things you very much disagree with.”

UU leaders often hold up the goals of multiculturalism and diversity. However, they don’t really want multiculturalism and diversity. A multicultural and diverse church would contain diverse political, social and ideological ideas and values. With their new expectations of political and ideological conformity, national UU leaders are trying to create a monoculture that, ironically, will exclude most racial, ethnic and other minorities.

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Conflicting Goals

The UUA’s efforts are not just about attracting minorities to UU but being more inclusive and empowering of minorities already in UU. The latter are important but cause a conflict.

Racial minorities in UU tend to be much further to the political left, more radical and identity politics-centric than the general racial minority population. Also, UU advertises itself as a “safe space,” so attracts from the small percentage of minorities who psychologically want or need safe spaces.

Many white UUs and white progressives are under the mistaken impression that radical minority activists are proxies for their entire demographics. This often is because UU leaders and idealogues misleadingly say that the positions are the majority views or the only “authentic voice” of minorities. UUs are learning about race relations from a tiny group that is unrepresentative of the larger minority groups. (Hirsi 2021) (Loury 2021)

Doing what “BIPOC of UU” want will make UU even less appealing to most outside racial minorities. The radicalization of UU may not only not attract many racial minorities to UU but likely will lead to many religious liberals leaving.

The conflict is exemplified by the word Latinx. UU works to be LGBT+ inclusive and the UUA, UU World and many UU congregations and groups commonly use the term Latinx. Latinx is simultaneously seen as gender-inclusive and is off-putting to a majority of Latinos. (Douthat 2019)

The use of Latinx demonstrates that UU aspires for the diversity and inclusion of numerous minority identities, not just racial and ethnic. In both practice and theory, this is a conundrum because minority cultures and demographics are never in exact alignment with each other. That’s why it’s a challenge to create successful multi-cultural and interfaith organizations. People with multiple identities often experience such internal conflicts.

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Many Ways to Create and Different Considerations of Diversity

Some UUs are not troubled by the lack of racial diversity. They say that most churches and congregations have particular cultures and demographics, such as Scandinavian Lutheran and Eastern Orthodox congregations, many Muslim and Hindu temples and Jewish synagogues. The least racially diverse American church is the National Baptist Convention with ninety-nine percent black membership. Of the six least racially diverse American churches, three are 90+ percent white and the other three are either 90+ percent black or 90+ percent Asian. With 80 percent of Jews worldwide being Ashkenazi, it’s no surprise that the synagogue I attend is predominantly Ashkenazi. Further, a congregation mostly attracts people from its neighborhood which means the congregation will tend to reflect the demographics of the neighborhood. (Pew Research Center 2015)

As far as attaining diversity and multiculturalism go, there is more than one way to skin a cat. For example, racially and ethnically monolithic congregations can do interfaith work with other congregations and organizations. A Seattle UU congregation belongs to an interfaith network with members from the neighborhood mosque, Hispanic Catholic congregation and synagogue working together in neighborhood charity work. This type of work involves not only a diversity of races, but of cultures and beliefs.

It is problematic when UUs want ethnic and racial minorities to be part of their church but only if they “think the way we do.” I see a tokenizing and fetishism in focusing strictly on the percentage of skin colors in a congregation, and a pandering in doing whatever it takes to attract people of different skin colors.

UU Minister Rev. Craig Moro wrote, “I suspect one of the things that drives ‘BIPOC’ folks away after a visit or two is that some UUs seem to be trying to ‘collect’ them– to add them to some sort of collection of skins and heads. That would scare me, too!”

An Asian man who quit UU wrote, “The tone of the entire organization has shifted more and more left and privileged as time goes on . . . When a person of color does show up (myself included), it was ridiculous. Our opinions were not valued because they were our opinions, but simply because of the color of our skin. In trying to be more inclusive, the organization became more racist. No non-white person wants to get in a room and watch rich white people flog themselves all day and apologize for transgressions that may or may not have ever happened. It is tiresome and has nothing to do with fellowship. It just makes those members feel better.”

I wonder about UU laity who are so easily and sometimes unquestioningly willing to discard their long-held UU values such as religious liberalism, self-determination, due process, diversity of individual views and paths, and freedom of expression simply because a small group of self-anointed authorities in classes and the pulpit instruct them to. It makes me wonder what other values they’d be willing to throw overboard in the name of a cause, because of the color of someone’s skin or to go along with a crowd.

Some UUs say that the object shouldn’t be to blindly fixate on a numbers game of “bringing in minorities” but on making sure congregations and members are welcoming to people of all racial, ethnic, and other demographics who are attracted to UU’s beliefs.

I belong to different communities. These include my Armenian-Iranian immigrant partner and her Armenian family, my mostly white but gender-diverse UU congregation, a synagogue, a multi-racial and racial minority-led workplace, and a vintage baseball card collecting club that is nearly all white male but with a wide diversity of religious and political beliefs. The combination of these and other relationships is my multi-cultural experience, and I neither expect nor want each to be the same.

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The challenge of creating racial diversity and how to attract and maintain minorities in dominant white churches is not an issue just for Unitarian Universalism. With challenges, successes and failures, there have been numerous attempts to create multi-racial Christian churches. (Gjelten 2020)

There is no one or objectively correct answer as to what should be achieved or how to achieve it, and any way involves conflicts and trade-offs. A church can’t be all things it wants and doesn’t want to be all things to all people. To gain one valued thing you often have to give up another valued thing, and pleasing one group of people within a community sometimes will turn off another group. Such is the nature of communities, especially in a liberal, pluralistic church.

However, I firmly believe the UUA’s and many UU congregations’ attempts to move UU as a whole further to the left into political extremism, both generally but in particular in the area of identity politics, and to try to create ideological and political homogony will neither attract substantial numbers of racial and ethnic minorities nor expand UU membership.

In fact, after I originally wrote this article in 2022 the UUA reported yet another huge drop in membership for 2023. (Added Update: The UUA’s 2024 report shows that the percentage of racial minorities in UU has also dropped). (UUA 2023)

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References

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Blake J (2010), “Why Sunday morning remains America’s most segregated hour”, https://religion.blogs.cnn.com/2010/10/06/why-sunday-morning-remains-americas-most-segregated-hour/

Braestrup K (2017), “Where Are We Headed?”, https://trulyopenmindsandhearts.blog/2017/11/21/where-are-we-headed/

Brown, M. (2020), “Democratic Whip James Clyburn: ‘Defund the police’ cost Democrats seats, hurt Black Lives Matter movement,” https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/2020/11/08/james-clyburn-defund-police-cost-democrats-seats-hurt-black-lives-matter/6216371002/

Cunningham V (2017). “The Case for Black English: In his latest book, John McWhorter celebrates the dialect that has become an American lingua franca,” https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2017/05/15/the-case-for-black-english

Douthat R (2019), “Democrats’ Latinx Problem”, https://www.nytimes.com/2019/11/05/opinion/latinix-warren-democrats.html

Frederick-Gray S (2021), “Sea Change, Not Slow Change”, https://www.uuworld.org/articles/president-fall-2021

Gallup (2020), “Black Americans Want Police to Retain Local Presence”, https://news.gallup.com/poll/316571/black-americans-police-retain-local-presence.aspx

Gjelten T (2020), “Multiracial Congregations May Not Bridge Racial Divide”, https://www.npr.org/2020/07/17/891600067/multiracial-congregations-may-not-bridge-racial-divide

Grossman C (2015), “Sunday Is Still the Most Segregated Day of the Week”, https://www.americamagazine.org/content/all-things/sunday-still-most-segregated-day-week

Halsted J (2019), “My Church is Dying and I’m OK with that”, https://praywithyourfeet.org/2019/12/17/my-church-is-dying-and-im-ok-with-that/

Hirsi I (2021), “Black Residents of Minneapolis Say They Need More Cops—Not Fewer”, https://www.thenation.com/article/politics/minneapolis-police-reform/

Leblang D (2017) “Area Jews ask: Why would a church show an anti-Semitic movie?”, https://www.jewishjournal.org/2017/11/02/area-jews-ask-why-would-a-church-show-an-anti-semitic-movie/

Loehr D (2005), “Why Unitarian Universalism is Dying”, https://files.meadville.edu/files/resources/why-unitarian-universalism-is-dying.pdf

Loury G (2021), “Wrestle not against flesh and blood: Original Essay of the Journal of Free Black Thought,” Journal of Free Black Thought

Loury G (2022), “Why Does Racial Inequality Persist?”, https://media4.manhattan-institute.org/sites/default/files/R-0519-GL.pdf

McArdle E (2016), “Rabbi Jacobs: Why I raised divestment concerns during celebration”, http://uuworld.org/articles/uuaga2016jacobsdivestment

McCardle E (2017),”Two-thirds of UU congregations participate in White Supremacy Teach-In”, https://www.uuworld.org/articles/two-thirds-participate-teach

McWhorter J (2022), “BIPOC is Jargon. That’s OK, and Normal People Don’t Have to Use It”,
https://www.nytimes.com/2022/03/25/opinion/bipoc-latinx.html

Monk Y (2018), “Americans Strongly Dislike PC Culture,”
http://theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2018/10/large-majorities-dislike-political-correctness/572581/

Moore M (2020), “Congressional Black Caucus chair: ‘Defund the police’ is ‘one of the worst slogans ever’”, https://nypost.com/2020/06/16/black-caucus-chair-defund-the-police-is-one-of-the-worst-slogans/

Morgenstern A (2020), “Conservative Values for Unitarian Universalists”, https://www.uucpa.org/services/conservative-values-for-unitarian-universalists-2/

Parker & Hurst (2021) “Growing share of Americans say they want more spending on police in their area”, https://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2021/10/26/growing-share-of-americans-say-they-want-more-spending-on-police-in-their-area/

Pew Research Center (2015), “The most and least racially diverse U.S. religious groups”, https://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2015/07/27/the-most-and-least-racially-diverse-u-s-religious-groups/

Pew Research Center (2020), “5 facts about black Democrats, https://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2020/02/27/5-facts-about-black-democrats/

Pew Research Center (2021) “Facts About the U.S. Black Population”, https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/fact-sheet/facts-about-the-us-black-population/

Sumner S (2022), “6 percent of Americans are woke extremists”, https://www.econlib.org/6-of-americans-are-woke-extremists/

ThinkNow (2019), “Progressive Latino pollster: 98% of Latinos do not identify with “Latinx” label,”
http://medium.com/@ThinkNowTweets/progressive-latino-pollster-trust-me-latinos-do-not-identify-with-latinx-63229adebcea

UUA (1997), “Toward an Anti-Racist Unitarian Universalist Association: 1997 Business Resolution”, https://www.uua.org/action/statements/toward-anti-racist-unitarian-universalist-association

UUA (2017), “Conservative Forum for Unitarian Universalists”, https://www.uua.org/offices/organizations/conservative-forum-unitarian-universalists

UUA (2020), “UUA Membership Statistics, 1961-2020”, https://www.uua.org/data/demographics/uua-statistics

UUA (2020), “The Unitarian Universalist Association Says It’s Time to Defund the Police”, https://www.uua.org/pressroom/press-releases/unitarian-universalist-association-says-its-time-defund-police

UUA (2023): “Annual Congregational Inventory,” https://dyn.uua.org/congregation/certlist.php?

UU World (2010),”Racial and ethnic diversity of Unitarian Universalists”, https://www.uuworld.org/articles/racial-ethnic-diversity-uus

Winston D (2020), “As Democrats go hard left, Hispanics head to the center”, https://rollcall.com/2021/06/23/as-democrats-go-hard-left-hispanics-head-to-the-center/

WSUU (2018), “Beloved Congregations”, https://wsuu.org/2018/11/07/sign-up-for-beloved-conversations-groups/

Are there many UU fellowships or churches where the CUUPS members kind of take the leadership role for the wider UU congregation? Specifically in Texas, but anywhere. I’ve heard Denton UU is and know they have a Strong CUUPS. Author John Beckett goes there and he is a Druid, Pagan and CUUPS member. I plan on reaching out to CUUPS after the holidays, I’m looking for a speaker who could give an introduction to CUUPS to older members. Another question, what besides Reddit is a good place to network for UU? I find no forums or message boards, if that is even still a thing.

Has anyone here belong to a congregation that has "let go" of a staff? As a board member, I feel stuck. About 12 years ago, we used to have a decent RE program (around 30 kids per week), but even before COVID, the numbers started to drop to about 10-15 kids per week. Post-COVID, it is about 8 kids. My first term on the board of directors, there were discussions on cutting their hours (and pay) because of the lack of growth and that we could not afford them ($58,000/ yr). Vocal parents that had kids in RE shut down any action in her hours being cut. So, here we are 6 years later. DRE makes more money and congregation is struggling financially. DRE is nice but no energy. Kids stop coming, families stop coming. Something has to give. Thoughts?

I was driving by a UU church in my community recently and just love the idea of it, but upon reading more in the website/promotional videos it mentions multiple times that it is a liberal community. Our political beliefs lean conservative-ish (realistically we are somewhere in the middle). I am not looking to join a community that is focused on political views. If most of the people there are liberal I couldn’t care less, but I wanted to ask since it specifically mentioned it a few times. Is it wrong to assume that the term liberal in the descriptions that I am seeing meant to have a political definition?

For a little background, I grew up in Christianity and so did my husband but neither of us really prescribed to the faith. I did enjoy attending church and having that sense of community, loving one another, and the social aspect was wonderful too. Personally, I have really been struggling with a lack of the sense of community where I am at. Growing up, the majority of our family friends were through our church. I went to a lot of church camps and such, but never really “bought in” to the religion of that makes sense. I do, however, believe that there are a lot of good life lessons and morals in all religions that would be good for my own children to be exposed to. I also want them to have that same sense of community but I don’t want to feel like a fraud taking them to church if I don’t really believe in it. Plus, I want them to have the opportunity to choose for themselves which (if any) religions resonate with them.

Those of you with experience/insight with both OWL and True Love Waits: I know OWL is great as a primary sex education teaching tool, but could it also be used to “unteach” some of the harmful and inaccurate teachings of True Love Waits? (specifically for adults who were raised in “purity culture”?)

UU is great, but mainstream Christianity's belief in hell for people who don't follow the Abrahamic God, from Hindus to Buddhists to atheists to pagans or even Abrahamic believers who don't live austere lives and actually have worldly fun like going to a rock concert or never wanting to marry or reproduce. The infinite torment for finite sins many of which don't harm anyone. It's refreshing knowing there used to be one Christian denomination that actually had preachers who said "there's no hell". I know you can be a UU who's a Christian universalist but it's not the same as the person in a stole saying point blank that my witch friends aren't going to hell, my friends who slept in on Sunday aren't going to hell, I'm not going to hell.

Our UU always hosts Christmas Eve service at a gorgeous chapel and the city’s non-Catholic christians usually attend, regardless if they’re UU. Last year, the Powers That Be decided to hold it on 23rd instead of 24th. We all thought it could be due to day of the week but they just announced they’ll be doing it again so that people can spend Eve with their family.

It feels so disrespectful. Our congregation has a history of diminishing and vilifying christian aspects of faith while uplifting pagan, jewish, and buddhist philosophies. They do a solstice event carefully planned for the date and hour but won’t do Christmas Eve on Christmas Eve.

I don’t know if an angry letter to the Board will do anything, and I’m not well connected enough to rally signatures, so I don’t know if there’s anything to do but it’s my last straw with this “church”. Not very democratic or accepting/encouraging spiritual growth IMO.

For the record, I grew up UU. Loved OWL and the multi-faith Religious Ed curriculum. But the adult part sucks so I’ll be switching to UCC for services.

As an unchurched UU, who drifted away during COVID and a major national move, I was feeling a tug to join my local UU congregation. However, I just discovered the amendments made to Article II and now have a deep sense of loss from this change that I'm now mourning.

I'm sure many of you here have adapted and are embracing the revisions. While bigger than me, I feel a sense of guilt for not being an active UUer and engaging in the process. I wanted to register my frustration and regret that I wasn't able to oppose these changes. It's my belief that the language has lost much of the substance, poetry, and history that attracted me to this faith community in the first place.

- Have UUers fully embraced this amendment?

- Is there any ongoing movement to re-revise the Article II language?

- Is there writing of deep theological substance that could make me feel that this revision is worthy of the liberal religious tradition?

Ok, so I know that this is probably a silly question, but I was wondering if one could be both Muslim and UU without sacrificing aspects of either belief system. Personally, I agree with 99% of Islam, and I think that a lot of the main points go well with the points of UU. (Kindness, charity, etc.) And, I agree with the main points of UU. (Especially the points of tolerance, acceptance, justice, etc.). My only issue is that some parts of each belief system conflict. For example, traditional Islam does not have a very open stance on gay/trans rights, something that UU does have. Personally I side with the UU side here being that I have been raised around queer people, and am LGBTQ+ myself. Of course, some Muslims believe that you can't be Muslim and pro-gay rights (despite the counter-evidence, but I digress). Additionally, I believe that all religions are right in a way, because I think that they're all getting at generally the same truth. (That is, seeking the truth and being a good person). This is not a common belief in Islam, as Islamic religious texts tend to use a "Them versus us" attitude. Of course, there are plenty of other points where my beliefs differ from Islam, especially in the whole "God isn't angry, he's a loving being" issue. But, for now I think you get the gist.

Now, there are plenty of Muslims that believe what I do regarding these issues, but I'm always worried about disrespecting religions. If I side with the majority of Muslims, I wouldn't be truly following UU. (Which I want to do!) If I side with UU, plenty of Muslims would call me sacrilegious and a kaffir, and I would never want to disrespect a religion, even though I a part of it for over 3 years so far. My questions are:

1. Is there a way to make both groups happy?
2. Is making both groups happy even a good use of my time? Does it matter in the end?
3. Are there any other Muslims UUs out there with similar situations to mine?
4. How can I merge my personal spirituality and beliefs with both religions/groups in the most effective way possible?

Please keep in mind that I am very new to Unitarian Universalism, and some of this information/terminology may be wrong. I may later repost this to the progressive Islam subreddit, but I want to see what this sub has to say first. Thank you for reading, and I hope you have an awesome day!

EDIT: The idea of hell is another place where I diverge from Islam. I truly do not believe that God is an angry being who hates his children. I believe that God, whoever they may be, is a being and love and light. God might be disappointed with us sometimes, but never angry. Just wanted to expand a bit more on that since it is very important to me.

I've been a Unitarian Universalist for 25 years. When I found this faith, the church I joined had a wide variety of both religious and political perspectives, all of which were treated with curiosity and respect. There were lots of services for many different faiths, giving us a chance to explore different belief systems and experience wide varieties of religious services. There was representation across the spectrum for political beliefs, and there were great (and respectful) conversations about the ideas valued on all sides.

15 years ago I moved to a new town, and joined the local UU church. As I've become more involved and gotten to know the congregation more, I've found that there is less and less tolerance for anyone who doesn't align far-left on the political spectrum, and for anyone who has spiritual interests beyond humanism or kindness. This political season has been brutal. Our congregation has been all but a mouthpiece for the extreme-left, and when I brought up as much to our minister, he said that perhaps I didn't realize that I had joined a "liberal faith" and that this was probably why I felt unwelcome, and that I should consider if this was really the right place for me. He's been a UU minister for about 4 years (2 with us), and as I understand it, this is the new party line that graduating ministers are expected to carry. His belief is that UUism and the UUA in particular are fundamentally left and focused more on social justice rather than spirituality. He (and many in the church) don't seem to care about the fact that we've lost good people because they've been made to feel uncomfortable and there are more of us who are debating leaving for somewhere more tolerant.

I've done some reading online, and it's clear that there are still those who hold to the bipartisan curiosity and valuing of diversity of perspective. I'm very interested finding other UUs who aren't as exclusively-left-aligned as what's being broadcast these days. I've heard there are online groups that aim to keep our organization more bipartisan and diverse. Has anyone heard of any groups like this? Or have things changed to the point where there really isn't tolerance now for anyone who's not aligned with the extreme left?

Journey, not the destination

Each and every one in our church intergenerational community

The natural world, of which we are all but a tiny part

People's generosity

Individual search for meaning

Good actions that advance Justice and Equity

How misunderstanding fuels polarization

by David Cycleback

Polling and studies, including by the University of Pennsylvania and Penn State University, reveal that political polarization in the United States extends beyond growing animosity—it is also fueled by widespread misunderstanding. Many Democrats and Republicans struggle to understand the perspectives, motivations, and reasoning of those on the opposite side.

Among Republicans, only one in four believes that most Democrats sincerely vote in the country’s best interests. Instead, they often attribute Democratic motivations to selfishness or manipulation, citing reasons like being "brainwashed by the mainstream media" and seeking "undeserved welfare and food stamps." A Republican voter from Florida described Democrats as wanting "cradle-to-grave assistance. In other words, Mommy!" About one in six Republicans claim Democrats vote for “free” benefits like healthcare, college, and welfare, though no Democrats polled described their motivations in such terms.

Democrats often hold similarly skewed views about Republicans, attributing their voting behavior to misinformation or selfishness. Republicans are frequently described as “VERY ill-informed,” voting because “Fox News told me to,” or being influenced by “what the right-wing media is feeding them.” Democrats also perceive Republicans as motivated by selfishness, claiming they think, “I’ve got mine, and I don’t want the libs to take it away.” Some Democrats describe Republican motivations as stemming from racism or authoritarianism, with statements describing Republican motivations as “I’m a racist, I hate non-whites,” and “I like a dictatorial system of government.”

This divide makes empathy and understanding difficult. A 77-year-old Republican woman admitted, “I cannot even wrap my mind around any reason they [Democrats] would be good for this country.” Similarly, a 33-year-old Democrat from California struggled to identify Republican motivations, speculating it might be about “moral values” or “protecting jobs from immigrants.”

Research from the McCourtney Institute for Democracy highlights a significant perception gap—the disparity between what partisans believe about their opponents and reality. For examples, both sides vastly overestimate the number of extreme members in the other party, Democrats vastly overestimate how many Republicans deny the existence of racism (most Republicans acknowledge it exists), while Republicans overestimate how many Democrats want a socialist country. Both sides underestimate the diversity of opinions within opposing parties.

The politically extreme—devout conservatives and progressive activists—exhibit the greatest distortions. By contrast, those in the middle and politically disengaged have more accurate perceptions of their opponents.

Frequent political news consumers tend to have larger perception gaps than those who follow the news occasionally, particularly when relying on partisan outlets.

Higher education also plays a role, especially among Democrats. Democrats with postgraduate degrees often have a more distorted view of Republicans than Democrats with less formal education. Republicans’ perceptions, by contrast, remain largely consistent regardless of education level, likely because universities are predominantly liberal leaning.

As Johns Hopkins University political science professor Yascha Mounk writes:

“Perhaps because institutions of higher learning tend to be dominated by liberals, Republicans who have gone to college are not more likely to caricature their ideological adversaries than those who dropped out of high school. But among Democrats, education seems to make the problem much worse... It is deeply worrying that Americans now have so little understanding of their political adversaries. It is downright disturbing that the very institutions that ought to help us become better informed may actually be deepening our mutual incomprehension.”

Social media exacerbates the issue. While most social media users do not post about politics, those who do tend to have significantly wider perception gaps. This results in others being exposed to distorted political narratives from the most polarized voices.

The consequences of these misperceptions are profound. People with larger perception gaps are more likely to describe their opponents as “hateful,” “ignorant,” and “bigoted,” fueling hostility and creating a vicious cycle of polarization.

Despite these challenges, there is hope. More than three-quarters of Americans believe the country’s divisions are not insurmountable. Many across the party divide share common values and agree on more issues than they realize. However, false narratives about the “other side” amplify division, making the nation feel more fractured than it is.

The core issue is not merely differing opinions but profound misunderstanding. Ironically, the institutions meant to educate and inform—universities, media, and social platforms—often worsen the divide. Bridging this gap requires confronting these misperceptions and finding the common ground that unites most people.

References:

Americans not only divided, but baffled by what motivates their opponents - The McCourtney Institute for Democracy

The Perception Gap

Republicans and Democrats Don't Understand Each Other - by Prof. Yousha Monk

Democrats and Republicans vastly underestimate the diversity of each other's views

I would love to connect. Thinking about moving to the area in the next couple years…

Compare UU and Reform Synagogue Post-Election Sermons

by David Cycleback

I am Sephardic Jewish and attend both a Unitarian Universalist (UU) congregation and a reform synagogue. Reform Judaism is a liberal denomination, the largest Jewish denomination in the world, and is comparable in religious liberal philosophy to traditional Unitarian Universalism.

I was struck at the difference in the sermons at the first services following the U.S. Presidential election. One, the UU minister’s sermon, was politically partisan and overtly anti-Trump. On the other hand, the rabbi’s words were nonpolitical and warmly welcomed Jews whatever their political beliefs or votes.

Although Unitarian Universalism is theoretically non-creedal and open to a diversity of viewpoints, it has become increasingly politically narrow, with the national organization, the Unitarian Universalist Association (UUA), becoming politically radical and doctrinal. Many UUs, even those who are politically left and active in social justice work, have voiced concerns that they joined a church—not a political party—and feel that the national organization now resembles a political action committee more than a spiritual organization.

As I wrote in the below linked post, this trend toward political partisanship and ideological narrowness is harmful to the UU church. It closes minds and regularly transforms UU spaces into tribalistic “us versus them” echo chambers— the opposite of what a spiritual community and liberal religion should be about.

What Unitarian Universalism loses as it becomes politically narrow

After the UU minister’s partisan, anti-Trump post-election sermon, one congregant wondered aloud if such sermons could endanger the congregation’s nonprofit status.

In contrast, below were the opening words from the rabbi at the synagogue:

"Shabbat shalom. We started with those iconic words from the prophet Isaiah: “For my house shall be called a house of prayer for all people.” It's one of the opening songs we do all the time, but I think it's especially resonant and important tonight. It reminds us of something that we feel very keenly and importantly here, which is this conviction that there must be spaces where people of good conscience and character can come together after being political opponents. That we can continue to live and work and pray together.

For those of you who are disappointed or devastated at the outcome of this election, remember we are Jews. Our people have marched through millennia. We've seen leaders come and go, all the while holding on to one mandate of ‘Be a light unto others.’ So if the world feels darker to you after this election, you and your light are needed more than ever.

For those of you who are joyful and celebrating the outcome of this election, remember we are Jews. Our people have marched through millennia. We have seen leaders come and we have seen leaders go, all the while holding one mandate of ‘Be a light unto others.’ So if the world feels brighter to you after this election, you will need to continue to illuminate the world around us. And perhaps one way to start is to find a neighbor who feels themselves sitting in darkness and to try to brighten up their world in the weeks ahead.

But no matter how you feel about the election results, we're Jews and we have one task, it's been our task for thousands of years and we're going to keep on doing it."

I've just begun exploring Unitarian Universalism. I understand that something they adhere to is the philosophy "deeds, not creeds." So I'm wondering how that translates into action by local UU members. If I were to join my local UU congregation and wanted to start being active in it, what are some examples of things I might get involved with? What deeds might I be a part of? What are some things I would be doing to make a difference in my congregation and in my community? I'm sure that UU provides many opportunities to make the world a better place, but so far I don't know what they are.

The New UUA Movement by John Stowe

Since 2017, when the Unitarian Universalist Association’s (UUA) Board declared that UUism and the Association were complicit with white supremacy culture, there has been a concerted, top-down effort to transform UUism from its historical theological foundations into a social justice, anti-racist, and anti-oppression movement. This Guest Reflection provides a perspective on the UUA’s attempt to transition the denomination from its historical foundations to what the author calls the “new UUA Movement.”

Historical Foundations

During the 1700s, empirical criticism led Congregational Calvinists to revisit their beliefs more rationally, starting with a rigorous examination of the Bible.

A new awareness of “natural philosophy” (science) influenced these early thinkers, who were proto-Unitarians and laid the foundation for the modern UU consciousness. Starting with their biblical criticism, they proposed a progressive evolution that developed a carefully crafted religion. These first non-doctrinal Congregationalists later became known as Unitarians. The term was intended as a pejorative for those questioning Christian dogma. Universalists traveled a similar path through their Calvinistic Baptist traditions. These proto-liberals could be considered the first to be declared “out of covenant.”

Once the free and responsible search for truth was initiated, it was unstoppable. Our UU forebears developed faith systems ranging from Semi-Arianism (Jesus is not divine) in the 1700s to Christian Humanism and Universal Salvation in the early 1800s, the Transcendentalism of Emerson and Thoreau, and late 19th—and early 20th-century Pragmatics and Objective Ideology. Each exploration was a natural development from the one before.

There was much disagreement. Yet, for all the dissension, “wrong” turns, and occasional backsliding, the net result was a decent, realistic attempt to reconcile our highest aspirations with the empirical knowledge of the day (science, technology, aesthetics, experience). Where orthodoxy remained frozen in dogma, liberals achieved a symbiotic relationship with expanding knowledge—something no other “organized” religious tradition can claim on a consistent historical basis.

Cluttered Spiritual Palate

In the latter half of the 20th century, liberal Protestant contributions to religious thought faltered. Thought leaders such as Reinhold Niebuhr, Paul Tillich, and our own James Luther Adams (Unitarian) and Clarence Skinner (Universalist) were still highly respected. Yet the cumulative effect of waves of radical skepticism nurtured by postmodernism began to make us all uncomfortable with religion itself, perhaps seeing it as an irrelevant relic.

Our own UU religious humanism gradually morphed into a “secular humanism with some religious trappings” that has kept us comfortable for far too long.

I grew up in a church forever hearing that UUs were “too intellectual.” Yet, for all our collective power, we haven’t contributed anything intellectually respectable to religion for more than a half-century.

In the 1970s, humanism was under attack and was seen as lacking the substance to deal with “real life” problems. Spiritually hungry UUs began to appropriate tasty bits from other traditions in the vacuum. As we claimed more sources for inspiration, these acquisitions were rationalized to indicate our religious “sophistication.” Our spiritual palate was becoming ever more cluttered. A little new age here, a bit of liberation there, a dash of Buddhism, a touch of spiritualism, add a bunch of social awareness. Mix it all up; throw it in the oven. Heat until half-baked.

The hard truth is we have borrowed far too much, far too freely, and created far too little. As a result, there has been a hole in the center of UUism for decades.

Ripe for Takeover

The new UUA Movement, promulgated by the UUA, filled this vacuum. The 2017 declaration to decenter “white supremacy culture” had an appeal in its uncluttered singularity. The Commission of Institutional Change (COIC) and its 2020 report, Widening the Circle of Concern, gave the decentering campaign a feel of thoughtful legitimacy. The June 2024 passage of the new Article II language intentionally severed our connection to our past. The new UUA Movement required this severance since our past was deemed to be the source of our alleged white supremacy tendencies.

The new Article II language expressly rejects the liberal-humanist foundations as racist. Thought leaders need not apply. We now have a “top-down” creedal approach based on a proscribed form of social action.

Welcome to the new UUA Movement.

The New UUA Movement

Beloved Community

Our current UUA leadership proclaims that a “beloved community” characterized by “liberating love” is the existential centerpiece of its new UUA Movement. But what does the new UAA movement say these terms mean?

Let’s start with the concept of “beloved community.” That concept has authentic meaning in the work of the American philosopher Josiah Royce (1855–1916), who originated the concept. He was building on an array of Enlightenment philosophers, such as Emmanuel Kant, Jean-Jacques Rousseau, John Locke, David Hume, and Baruch Spinoza. While none of these philosophers explicitly discussed a “beloved community,” their contributions provide ethical foundations for a society based on love, respect, justice, and mutual care. Royce envisioned the “beloved community” as an ideal society rooted in mutual care, understanding, and moral harmony, where people work collaboratively for the common good, transcending individual self-interest.

Royce worked during a period of remarkable UU-inspired thinking. He stressed the fundamental importance of community as well as individual consciousness. He believed the relationship between individuals and groups creates deeply improved thinking and social quality. Royce explains how loyal truth-seekers can act as a transcendent moral source and witness.

As interpreted by the Bylaws Renewal team, created in June 2022 to “reimagine” the UUA through a complete rewrite of the Association’s bylaws, the concept is perverted to make “beloved community” exist over and against the problem of individualism, which emphasizes the idea that each person should have the freedom to make their own choices, pursue their own goals, and develop their unique identity, often placing personal success and fulfillment above collective goals or societal norms.

In the effort to bring about the Beloved Community, we often err on the side of the individual as the primary agent of change over and against systemic change.

This perversion of the beloved community is repeated throughout the COIC report. It utterly fails to appreciate Royce’s work and contradicts the original meaning of the beloved community. There is little evidence that the new UUA movement knows the origin of the concept they’ve appropriated or can appreciate its philosophical pedigree and meaning.

Liberating Love

In the Article II revision, the new UUA movement defines “liberating love” as a dynamic, action-oriented principle that promotes social justice through equitable relationships and the healing of historic injustices.

Though James Luther Adams (1901–1994) never used the phrase “liberating love,” there is abundant evidence the new UUA’s use of that phrase is deeply indebted to this prominent Unitarian theologian. His theological work emphasizes the transformative power of love within communities, fostering a more just and compassionate society. Adams aligns closely with the concept of love as a liberating force. However, no evidence exists that the new UUA Movement acknowledged its debt to Adams for originating the concept.

The Values of the UUA Bylaws Renewal Team

• Interdependence over individualism
• Ending the centering of white culture
• Trusting leadership over fear of authority
• Freedom to act over risk avoidance
• Strategy, objectives, and plans over monitoring and oversight
• Clarity and simplicity over complexity
• Decisions located organizationally based on importance to mission

Let’s examine just three of these values.

“Interdependence over Individualism”

Let’s be clear: “Interdependence over Individualism” is a false choice. UUs do not subscribe to individualism. They value individuality and personal conscience, not individualism. Individualism is the idea that an individual’s wants and values are more important than collective needs and that organizations exist solely for the benefits they provide to their members.

UUs believe all persons’ ideas, cultures, capabilities, and experiences are essential to forming a good society and, when taken at their best, result in a collective far greater than the sum of its parts. Our Seventh Principle stresses this “deep consciousness of community” in the phrase respect for the interdependent web of all existence. Thus, interdependence and individuality are inextricably linked, and our 1st Principle, which honors the “inherent worth” of individuals, is an absolute necessity for healthful interdependence. Royce would agree.

Ending of White Culture

UUA leadership has used the term “white culture” as a proxy for Enlightenment values. The legacy values of the Enlightenment are the foundation of Western culture—a legacy of a community constituted by liberty and democracy, equality and social justice, individual rights, and reason. The UUA logic is simple: White men conceived of such ideas; ergo, they are racist ideas.

An irony of the new UUA Movement is that it centers on the beloved community as an existential centerpiece in its campaign to fight racism. That is, Royce’s “beloved community” is itself a product of those same white culture/Enlightenment characteristics of logic-based and closely reasoned processes that UUA leadership now so roundly decries must be decentered!

Remember, too, that Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., a Black man, incorporated Royce’s “beloved community” concept into his 1960s Civil Rights movement to provide an image of a future, more harmonious multi-racial society. Does the UUA now demand that the Civil Rights Movement and King himself be decentered and declared invalid?

These contradictions beg the question, “Is UUA leadership aware of these glaring contradictions? If they are, then they are morally dishonest. If not, then they are intellectually incompetent.

The same criticism of dishonesty or incompetency leveled at the use of “beloved community” can also be leveled at the new UUA Movement’s appropriation of James Luther Adams. He was a straight white male. Should Adams and his theology be decentered and now declared invalid?

Instead of the obsession with “end the centering white culture,” why not contextualize Euro-centric and American culture so that the best of its informing values, shorn of the discredited “scientific racism” and eugenics, can be used productively toward the goal they have always had—social and racial justice?

Trusting Leadership over Fear of Authority

By “trusting leadership over fear of authority,” the new UUA Movement intends to shift moral and spiritual leadership away from individuals and congregations to the UUA national leadership. Effectively, “liberating love” is a coded attempt to obtain unearned authority and unaccountable control. Add the requirement for personal confessions of privilege—guilt and the demand for unquestioned acceptance of the new UUA Movement, and you get the loss of democratic governance and the imposition of authoritarian top-down control.

Despite the rather blatant attempt to restructure power away from individuals and congregations, UUA leadership continues to insist it operates under a democratic mandate from the General Assembly election process. It does not.

It is ironic that the Bylaws Renewal Team even quotes from the UUA’s 2009 Fifth Principle Task Force Report, which advocated for strengthening democracy at the UUA’s yearly General Assembly. The General Assembly is not democratic, and delegates are neither representatives of their congregations (other than being members) nor accountable to them.

After three attempts by individuals through the petition process to be genuinely elected to the UUA Board of Trustees, that body now contains only appointed trustees. General Assembly remains as broken today as it was in 2009.

“Trusting leadership over fear of authority” is just a mechanism to gain power without scrutiny or accountability.

The Theological Wasteland of the New UUA Movement

Where is the transcendence, humility, or devotion in the new UUA Movement writings?

While I have seen the word “humility” occasionally used, the authors of the new UUA Movement are 100% self-righteously assured of the rectitude of their beliefs. The UUA offers one and only one valid path to social justice, with its “beloved community” and “liberating love.” All UUs must follow this path exclusively. Questioning or disagreeing will result in censure or worse.

The new UUA Movement offers no foundation comparable to our religious Unitarian and Universalist heritages. Unitarianism and Universalism emerged from a long progression of thoughtful consideration of scripture, philosophy, science, and aesthetics. There is simply no way that a constructive theology can be developed in our modern era without using the best work that the Western religious, intellectual, aesthetic, and scientific traditions have produced.

Instead, the new UUA approach is simplistic. It is based on crude generalizations, replacing nuanced thought with a checklist of proscribed “either-or” positions.

The fact that the new UUA Movement beliefs fall on the left side of the social/political spectrum—or, better said, the “far left”—does not remove the permanent stain of illiberality.

A theology of “liberating love” has been assembled from cherry-picked bits of post-modern standpoint theory, liberation theology, and critical race theory, with a pretense of intellectual heft attempted by a whisper of Josiah Royce and lip service to the work of James Luther Adams. Royce and Adams have real potential value, but our UU leadership has failed to do the hard work of developing a coherent narrative.

By itself, “love” is not a theology, “liberating” or not, nor is a pretty picture of a flower with values petals. The preoccupation with reordering power structures is disturbing, and no amount of quasi-theological gloss can cover its true intent.

The extreme emphasis on power dynamics between groups in the “theology” of the new UUA movement and the rigid hierarchy of righteousness (based on the marginalization of race, heritage, class, or ability) are, for want of a better term, “neo-Calvinistic.” We have effectively been returned to the same power structures that Unitarians and Universalists fled in the 1700s.

"Religion is the vision of something that stands beyond, behind, and within the passing flux of immediate things; something that is real and yet waiting to be realized; something that is a remote possibility and yet the greatest of present facts; something that gives meaning to all that passes, and yet eludes apprehension; something whose possession is the final good, and yet is beyond all reach; something which is the ultimate ideal, and the hopeless quest. " (A. N. Whitehead)

So I know that comes off negative. I really resonate with the ideals of UU, but my local UU feels sooooo pretentious ever time I go. It's like they try sooo hard to be PC that there is no real message other than "be pc" I'm asking this question, because I live in a very affluent and educated town. So, I'm wondering if the prevention comes from that or the UU itself??? I appreciate your help, I'm looking for my place, but though I want this to be it,it doesn't feel right. Thx

Background: I have been an agnostic for as long as long as I can remember. Growing up I would constantly see people around me self ascribed as religious be just as mean or cruel as anyone else. I saw mega churches reinvesting their wealth into themselves and leadership, and a total lack of community outreach that went past gaining more members. I was always interested in religion but throughout the years I saw that is was being used primarily a tool being used to manipulate. As far as i could tell this was against the teachings of any of these religions.
^{I realize these people do not represent all people of religion, I have met far too many people who uphold the positive teachings of their religion to believe that.}

All of this to say I really enjoy the ideals of UU, they align to a T with what I believe, but I have been having trouble convincing myself to attend a service. I think due to my past, and years of seeing the dangers of religion, attending something that resembles these same service fills me with dread. I am so concerned that the feel of a service is just going to make me horribly uncomfortable, in the same way I feel uncomfortable during the ceremony's of funerals and weddings. However at the same time I feel like I have a hole in my life where community is supposed to go.

Does anyone have any advice? Maybe there is a way to be apart of UU that is not an actual service, but a social thing?

From high school up until my mid-20s, I had typical atheist beliefs on life after death. At the time, I was able to be calm with the prospect of nonexistence and believed it was fair, since I was thinking mostly of myself, my friends, and people in the modern developed world, who usually live long and fulfilled lives and are ready to rest afterwards.

However, the concept of everyone getting nonexistence has felt more and more unfair to me the past several years as I’ve learned more about the history of the world.

All kinds of societies have practiced human sacrifice. Which would mean the victims would go: short and usually painful life —> extremely painful death —> permanent nonexistence. Is that fair? Where do they get to cash in or get pleasure? Nowhere.

My faithlessness has also been tested by movie characters such as Trevor in Pay It Forward. Was it fair for him (or a real-life person like him) to get nonexistence after 15 years, a good contribution to philanthropy, and almost no rewards? Absolutely not in my opinion.

My mind is having trouble sitting still on this anymore, and I’m considering officially becoming a Unitarian Universalist because of their doctrine that everyone can get to success.

I still don’t believe in a literal fluffy-cloud heaven, but I do think there are physics-based ways in which living again is possible, e.g., the Poincaré recurrence theorem or spontaneous quantum decreases in entropy. Heaven, in my mind, is nothing more than someone who got dealt a bad hand being given a chance to try again.

This in mind, do you guys think UU is a good choice for me? Do these beliefs jive with those that are followed by UUs?

I’m also a gay man and appreciate the “kindness and volunteering” aspects of religion and spirituality but not usually the “moral code” ones, and I know UU heavily emphasizes the former.

Stay strong against all the craziness ahead.

- AM702

Las Vegas, NV, USA

Hi, hope you are all doing well. Heres the basics of what i believe and hopefully someone here can tell me if it sounds similar to something they have heard of.

I believe the bible to be a book of wisdom written by people through stories that was passdd on. Like the first self help book. A very usefull guide.

I dont believe there is an actual god and his son and their spirit looking over us. I dont believe there to be an after life in hell or heaven. But rather the collection of choices you make in daily life leads you to existing in a state of heaven or hell.

Thanks in advance and i apologise if i offend anyone!

https://wagingnonviolence.org/2024/11/10-things-to-do-if-trump-wins/

So, the reason I initially joined the UU is because I was getting tired of constant political media's cynicism.

I am a Progressive and vote every election and I doubt that will ever change, but I have had some tough feelings regarding politics. I feel I was almost forced from a young age to pay attention to politics more than a person should because my family insisted on always playing "SNL" or various political pundits around me (though maybe that is normal, IDK). I used to very much emphasize Christianity also as part of my personality but I eventually became frustrated with my overly-evangelical church the LCMS (I know being from a Progressive but also LCMS family is a strange combination). I think I tried to fill the hole that left in me yearning for community with the political movement of Communism, which though I am not exactly Capitalism's #1 fan, this at the very least wasn't a healthy reason to join them. I eventually however began actively avoiding politics when I started noticing contradictions. For instance, take the fact that many online communist activists (not all) will say that "The world is always getting worse" when Marx had the largely optimistic view that the world is getting better, or fantasizing about a glorious and Bloody Communist Revolutionary War when again Marx viewed a generally peaceful transition of power. In the past I had sorta thought that we were correct because we were the good guys, but I ended up realizing people aren't that simple. I used to watch News daily because I felt I had to know what was going on, but after a while I realized pundits are actually the worst activists. Turns out the best activists are those who AREN'T miserable and fearful 24/7, who would've guessed? While I admit it is a little ironic that I quote Nietzche in a post complaining about cynicism (something which he was known for) I do think it is relevant that he said something about how Daily News Media makes you focus on small irrelevant details always scared of some event that never ends up happening, and makes you stupider in the long run and it takes your focus away from the larger historical cultural shifts or perhaps even more importantly takes away focus from the family and friends around you.

This frustration of contradictions in Media continues to happen during this election. For instance, it frustrates me that before the election if I said to someone "OK so Trump has a 50/50 chance of winning, so whats our Plan B if he wins" cuz to me not having a plan B seemed irrational, yet they would always just say "There is no Plan B because if Trump wins the world ends". Now they talk much more softly about Trump and don't want to talk about all the things they said he would do. This drives me crazy as I don't know whether to believe the first thing they said (the overly cynical view) or the last (the overly positive view). It reminds me of how Evangelical Christians will make a highly exxagerated image of hell and the endtimes not because the Bible actually teaches it, but because its a useful recruiting tactics and to them the anxiety it causes people is a necessary evil. Or the fact that many of those communist pundits mentioned above said that Harris was a worse candidate than Biden & Clinton, when they got upset at Biden said she was a great candidate and was basically guaranteed to win, and then went back to saying she is a terrible candidate after she lost. Or that depending on the month Biden having dementia was either a matter of fact liberals won't address, or a Conservative lie. All while smugly saying how "Oh if only people listened to ME none of this would have happened" never admitting that they were wrong.

Now, I must confess a way in which I was wrong. I was very big on a political prediction system called "Allan Lichtman's 13 keys" and was extraordinarily confident in saying Harris would win. Well, wouldn't you know it, for the first time ever this election Lichtman's keys were wrong. Now I feel like my family will never believe anything I say ever again, and frankly I am having an existential crisis right now of my own, wondering if anything I ever believed ever was true, if my life and the work I have done has had any point at all, as though the foundations of my knowledge were built on sand that just broke down. Though again I feel like when I would say "I'd rather not talk about politics" right now they wouldn't respect my wishes and that probably did not help, I don't know how but I'm going to have to explain to them that they really do need to stop talking about politics to me, not that the issues aren't important but I feel like it is truly draining my enjoyment of life away.

Despite my self-doubts, I would like to believe that America will survive. The reason I post this here is because the UU and the climate activists (a.k.a. the people who are actually doing work instead of just talking about how miserable things are) are the most optimistic about the future. And even if America were to become a dictatorship that's certainly unfortunate for its citizens, but we Americans tend to forget despite our power (which largely comes from being taken seriously by other countries) we are just 1% of the world population. What I enjoyed about the UU is that it kept those Progressive ideals but removed the needless cynicism always present among pundits. It is important to remember that literally every period of history people thought that they lived in the worst of times and the world was coming to an end. And even if worst comes to worst and the world truly ends, then at least let me spend my last moments happy and not constantly scrolling clickbait videos about how "The World is Ending".

Anyway, forgive me if this was long and overly personal, I am having trouble wrestling with my own thoughts if you can't tell and this sub just seemed saner than most, but please feel more than free to tell me where I'm wrong.

"Sorrow is better than fear. Fear is a journey, a terrible journey, but sorrow is at least an arrival. When the storm threatens, a man is afraid for his house. But when the house is destroyed, there is something to do. About a storm he can do nothing, but he can rebuild a house." – Alan Paton

UU Doug Muder posted this quote today. I was disappointed several days ago when UUA posted some things in anticipation that were based more in fear than in rebuilding. I think we have gotten into power rather than trying to understand everyone's needs and fears. Eight years ago, we responded with fear and loathing. This time I hope we will respond with love and understanding for everyone, instead of condemning half of the country as foolish or evil.

Talking with UUs recently, I've heard many comments about UU's Protestant Christian formats, and often language of the services. While pluralistic, and perhaps with most UUs not being Christian, U and U were original Christian denominations, and UU has preserved the Christian service format.

In the other UU forum, the moderator posted the below discussion from from an Ex Christians reddit forum where commentors also brought up the Christian formats of UU services, and how it is Christian without the Christianity.

Has anyone tried going to a Universalist Unitarian church? : r/exchristian

I'm thus curious about what folks here think about it? Do you like it? Do you wish it was different? How would you change it? Mix it up with other format? What do you think of the Christian language (worship, faith, etc.)

I note that I'm Jewish and my partner is from the Middle East. She dislikes the Christian format of UU services and won't attend, while it it is fine with me. I do find the Christian format without Christian theology to be a bit ironic and performatively hollow. However, my practical philosophy is a service has to have some format. Also, if you attend a Reform Jewish Shabbot service, you know that they are not so much different than a UU service.

I myself am remembering my grandmother on my father's side.

She was a very courageous woman. She was the one who courted my grandfather in a time and place where doing such was a huge taboo for women to do.

She taught me to be bold and to persevere.

"Funny Thing About Death” will be the irreverent theme for a Sunday service at a small Unitarian Universalist Church. Rev. Phillip Schulman said, “I had a wild idea to break from the dominant pattern of solemnity & somberness.” He’s inviting humor & free expression of the “bizarre or unreasonable aspects of death.” John Prine’s song has the spirit:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3bzJtYFHZF0

I went to my first service last week, as I mentioned in a previous post, and I really enjoyed it. One question I had but didn’t get a chance to ask—and I’m hoping someone here might be able to answer—is about the very beginning of the service when the reverend lit a candle in a chalice. Could someone explain the significance of the flaming chalice in basic terms?

Also, shortly after that, the congregation was invited to come up and light a small candle on what looked like a metal tree, with one on each side of the sanctuary. During this time, there was a beautiful piece played on the piano, which made the moment feel even more meaningful. I’d love to understand the meaning behind this practice as well.

Thanks in advance for any insights.

I'm looking for feedback from anyone whose congregation has taken part in the UU Climate Justice Revival. Our congregation is doing our revival weekend in January, and I am on the social action committee which is facilitating, so I would love some insight from anyone who has already taken part either as a facilitator or an attendee.

Which parts did you find worked best or were not so great? Did you rely heavily on the provided videos/stick to the script or was it more free flowing? Anything come up that you wish you had prepared for or done differently?

So once upon a time I applied to a job at a protestant church and I get the ocassional email from them listing events and services. Anyway I saw 2 events they've done that I'd like my UU congregation to consider doing.

I saw that this other church puts together harm reduction kits and they also had a service that focused on sex work and sex workers. Both of these are things I'd like to see in my UU church/congregation but there's a part of me that feels it may be too radical for some but at the same time I feel they're the kind of topics that we should be talking about and spreading awareness, reducing stigma etc.

I don't know if this post makes sense but those are my thoughts.

While he is talking about politics, I think it is also applicable to UUism, which is increasingly aligned with progressive ideology (and we embody the educational elite he describes - not religious group in the US but Hindus has more education or post-graduate degrees).

https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2024/10/trumpism-republican-party-exile-david-brooks/680243/?gift=UyN9DCjOc2Mh2mDsMFTgT3fwf4P78eZ5OvQd6nw4Olw&utm_source=copy-link&utm_medium=social&utm_campaign=share

ConspiracyTheories #DeepPolarization #BuildingBridges

I think this minister is onto something:

"What if the most absurd conspiracy theory could reveal profound truths about our deepest human needs? In a world where divisions run deep and conversations can feel like battlegrounds, how do we reach across the chasms that separate us? Join us as we uncover surprising insights into why we cling to certain beliefs, explore the power of love that stretches beyond comfort zones, and discover whether the bridges between us are closer than they appear."

https://youtu.be/qDyNXgj5pGk

I and others regularly notice that alternative viewpoints on this and the other UU forum are regularly mass downvoted in what I assume is a attempt to collapse or hide them. For just an example, the below comment by another user was hidden:

Thank you for sharing! I realize that many out there do not like the concept of diversity of thought and opinion. But Michael Servetus provided a beacon of hope for those like me that enjoy diversity by willing to stake his life on it. I will stake my reddit karma on it here! https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Michael_Servetus It will be good for the UUA to have some friendly competition to help provide the organizational support and ministerial search support that all congregations benefit from.

This all reflects poorly on the the forums and UU, which is supposed to be a liberal, pluralistic, noncreedal church and welcomes and listens to diverse viewpoints. It represents bad trends in UU these days, and trends that have driven many from their congregations and UU.

I make this an OP, because I know it can be downvoted but not hidden from view.

Hi,

I’m a newer member. I joined a group earlier this year. I have decided I’d like to leave for several reasons but have not told any other members. I haven’t met my pledge yet either. How does one leave? Do I have to meet my pledge before I leave?

strict church theory is that strict conservative churches grow while leniant liberal churches decline because of their austere demands of congregants. uu is declining, unity church is declining, united church of christ is declining, church of the prismatic light was a flash in the pan, mainline protestant churches are declining but evangelical, amish and mormon churches are all growing like kudzu. southern baptists got the lion share of congregants from the split northern baptists are like "american baptist who?" even though northern baptists are a lot less effed up.

but maybe it's not so bad we're small? why does liberal religion need a single institution to be big? i think the biggest u in uu isn't unitarian or universalist, it's unchurched, meaning folx that have the same beliefs as uu's but don't want to participate in organized religion. and i think uu's leniance is a virtue cos imo the difference between a religion and a cult is how they treat folx who left the faith, a test uu passes with flying colors. i think instead of concentrating on numbers for one religion uu should foster more interfaith stuff with like-hearted believers of all institutions and of none at all. it might even help uu get more folx since most people don't even know uu doesn't do dogma and that in this historically christian religion you can even be pagan (most pagans don't tell anyone they are pagan, let alone do so in a place that looks like a christian church).

tldr, love over numbers, many institutions over one

I am a person who professes another religion but I like to attend the services of Unitarian churches, especially when I am away from my community. In addition to the CLF services, do you know of other churches with online services?

This is me coming back to update everyone on my experience! Last week, I made a post looking for guidance on whether Unitarian Universalism would be a good fit for me and how to attend a service. Many of you responded with kind words of encouragement, and today, I finally attended.

When I say my experience was incredible, I truly mean it. I arrived at the parking lot about 10 minutes before the service, which was scheduled to begin at 11 AM. Guest parking was clearly marked and easy to find—especially since my anxiety had me checking it out on Google Earth beforehand! The lot was packed, which was definitely not what I had expected. The campus itself is shaped like a large “U,” with a massive courtyard in the middle.

As I followed others into the courtyard, two older women approached me right away, asked if I was new, and kindly showed me to the welcome table outside the sanctuary. There, I met one of the greeters, who was incredibly welcoming. He explained how the service would go, offered me a name badge, and handed me the order of service. After that, he led me into the sanctuary and told me I could sit wherever I felt comfortable.

The sanctuary was beautiful—filled with natural light and high wood ceilings that felt inspirational. And the smell… it was like honeysuckle or fresh flowers. Just amazing. Today’s service focused on remembering our loved ones who have passed, which tied into Día de los Muertos. The music was moving, the readings from the reverend were thoughtful, and I even appreciated the part when all the new guests were asked to stand so the congregation could welcome us. Several of us stood, and the applause we received was so heartwarming. It was a wonderful feeling.

There was also a moment during the service where everyone greeted their neighbors, which I enjoyed. Several people came over to introduce themselves to me, making me feel even more at ease. After the service, they had food and coffee available for everyone. A woman came up to me and asked if I’d be interested in a UU 101 course, just to learn more about the religion and what it means. She wasn’t pushy at all, just kind and informative, so I agreed.

The course itself was great—there were a few other people joining too. The two women leading the course were knowledgeable and passionate, but never in a way that felt intimidating. Afterward, they gave us a tour of the campus, showing us a library filled with books by philosophers, social justice authors, and writings on the UU faith. They encouraged us to explore the campus freely and made it clear that we were welcome back anytime.

What struck me most was that, throughout the entire experience, no one was trying to impose their beliefs on me. It was clear that everyone holds their own beliefs, and the focus of the UU faith is to support individuals in finding what they believe in. I will definitely be back next week!

to add* yes, they had coffee. 🤣 It was offered both before and after the service. The courtyard had a covered patio and if I had to guess, I would say around 40 people were gathered, drinking coffee and eating pastries, while chatting with others.

Hi everyone! I’m seeking some guidance or insight from those who may have walked a similar path. I grew up in a large family that occasionally attended a Pentecostal church, though we weren’t deeply committed to it—it was more of a convenience. After I came out, my family was essentially pushed out of the church, and we haven’t returned since. These days, my parents will still mention God or talk about Christ, but it’s not as fervent as it was during my childhood.

As I’ve gotten older, I’ve found myself grappling with my faith and spiritual identity. I’ve always had so many questions about religion, but more often than not, my questions were either dismissed or left unanswered. Now, nearing 30, I know I believe in something, but I’m not entirely sure what. Recently, I came across Unitarian Universalism (UU), and it really piqued my interest.

There’s a UU church less than 15 minutes from me here in Texas, and I’m curious about attending a service. Do you simply walk in and take a seat in the sanctuary? I’m a bit cautious about attending because I’ve never been to a place like this, and I’m unsure what to expect.

Could anyone explain, in simple terms, what UU believes? What texts, if any, are used? And as someone who might identify as agnostic (I don’t deny the existence of a higher power, but I feel it may be impossible for humans to fully understand it), do you think UU would be a good fit for me? I’d really appreciate any insights or experiences!

North American Unitarian Association hosts its first conference at Spokane church with focus on political division from keynote speaker John Wood Jr. | The Spokesman-Review

I’m a member/employee at my church, and have been struggling in recent months to do my job and feel safe in my community because of our minister. She is extraordinarily controlling, dismissive, gossipy, and generally seemingly out of touch with the practice of our UU values. When I first started attending we were lay-led and struggling to find a minister, so there’s this weird aspect to the congregational relationship where many people are super grateful because she stepped up and took charge, but those who actually have to work with her on a close basis (most church employees) are struggling. When she first came, I personally felt written off by her (she would literally ignore me if I tried to talk to her)until she realized that I was “important” in some way as I am heavily involved both in logistics for the church and several of our activities. I wanted to write this off as generational and cultural differences as she is from the opposite side of the country from our church, but I’ve continued to feel dismissed in our interactions. One of the first times I spoke with her it was to discuss use of our space for letter writing campaign for a cease-fire in Gaza. I was told that we “can’t have it here“ despite the fact that other UUs in our area were at the time doing the similar campaigns. She later made it clear from the pulpit that she “agreed with President Biden” on condemning the protests against the genocide, which is ironic because I’ve been told several times not to bring up politics. She has: -Repeatedly ignored my and others instructions in how to treat our sound equipment, resulting in us having to purchase new microphones that we had not budgeted for. -Gotten up out of her seat and gone to the back of the room mid-service to tell me I was doing something with our projection she didn’t like -Complained in spaces where I was not present about me posting on our social media without her permission (I started our instagram with her and she does not post on it- and all I was posting was taken directly from our newsletter. -taken down decorations put up by others directly before a service. -multiple times kicked me and my coworker out of the chapel while we were securing equipment which has to be done after service. -berated our pianist for using her phone during service to look at the script. -when I performed at our auction, she looking at her phone a for THE ENTIRETY of my 10 minute performance. Today, she sent an email thanking me for my “attempts” to moderate our facebook page after she promoted a post about us being queer affirming that was immediately swarmed by the wrong kind of attention, and reminding me not to post anything “political”. I assume the latter was in regard to my post about Indigenous People’s Day, in which I shared information about the specific tribe whose lands the church resides on. I was very careful to share only facts in the post, and I quite literally used to work at a museum that covered 19th century history in our area, so I’m unsure how that could be considered political. I’m a pretty direct communicator and would love to just work this out by sitting down with her, but on occasions I’ve met with her for lunch or meetings I have found her to be very unreceptive and quite prone to uncomfortably racially charged stories about her time in India. From my talks with other congregants and staff members, feeling uncomfortable with her seems to be a common occurrence (4/5 staff I’ve spoken to) and several members, including our oldest member. I am considering going to the board about it, but I’m currently on my way to petition them to add social media management to my job title as there is an increasing need that cannot be met through volunteer work and I don’t want to ruffle any feathers until that’s gone through. My church is pretty much my whole community, and while I don’t want to even consider leaving, I’m unsure what other course of action I can even take here.

I live in a rural part of WV and have no access to a UU church, so I figured I would do a virtual service. I really enjoyed it and wish there was a physical place I could go to socialize in person. I was raised Catholic, but never kept with it. Over the past few years I have been searching for a spiritual path. I work outside everyday so I have always felt connected to the natural world. I have read the Torah, practiced Paganism, looked into Eastern Orthodox, Buddhism, Tarot, Transcendentalism, Hermeticism and even Chaos Magick. I feel like sprinting through a Labyrinth, but today's service felt good.

What should I read, listen to, or watch to learn more about the history, beliefs, and philosophy of Unitarian Universalism? I'm someone who really likes to read the fine print before committing. I don't think I'll learn anything that will stop me from joining, but I don't want to declare myself a UU without being able to explain what that means.

Thoroughly skippable details:

I went to my friend's UU church as a teen and off and on to the largest one in my area a few years ago, but it didn't feel like a good fit and I had an appalling experience at their new member meeting and a bad time at a few services. About a year and a half ago, I started going to a tiny UU church near me, only about 20 or so members and about the same number of regular guests.

I like it. It's not perfect, the members are older and white and a bit out of touch, the size of the congregation limits the amount of impact they can have, and there's a little more emphasis on activism than on spirituality. But, they're not at all stuck on staying the same for eternity and are looking to evolve and they've been really welcoming. A few people drive me crazy, but that's anywhere.

Thank you!