He's also the only person I've met in Ohio who has been or is now or even recognizes the words "Unitarian Universalist." He LOLs and winces at many of the UU experiences I relate, such as the clothing-optional spa at my childhood summer camp.

I'm a small-l libertarian Mormon who was raised as a Unitarian Universalist, so I think there should be a "neither of these answers represent what I actually think and it pisses me off that you insist on categorizing me in this manner" option.