The recent brouhaha, over UU World's article on "After L, G, and B," as well as a lot of the current focus on anti-racism work, has highlighted something that's started to disturb me about our denominational approach to "welcoming" and "inclusion."
It seems to me, that our "airwaves" - and certainly top-down direction from UUA and various interest groups – has become dominated by "orthodoxy," (call it "political correctness" if you will), and by those who promote various formal programs ("Welcoming Congregation," various workshops, etc.). And... woe to anyone who questions the orthodoxy in some forums. Case in point: "After L, G, and B" could have served as a starting point for bringing people together - instead, outrage, shaming, and guilting dominated the ensuing conversation in what limited forums there were for any discussion (notably UU World's Facebook group - it's not like UU World has an active letters column, or allows for online comments on articles). And the few of us who commented that the outrage, and subsequent apology by UU World's editor, were perhaps over the line, immediately got pounced on by the proponents of orthodoxy (funny, isn't it, that the folks who complained the loudest, and got the most "ink," were professional "educators" with workshops to sell, "allies," and yes, the term "social justice warrior" seems fitting).
It strikes me that there is a fundamental difference between:
- Starting by finding common ground. Perhaps around our 7 principles. And then moving on to celebrate our differences, and perhaps make accomodations where appropriate (handicap ramps, gender-neutral bathrooms, maybe a few services that focus on specific issues).
- Starting with our differences. Encouraging outrage. Shaming & guilting ourselves, and others, into changing our ways. Formal processes. "Call-Out Culture," if you will.
Personally, it strikes me that:
- We have way too much of the latter these days, and perhaps too little of the former.
- We have much to be proud of. Our values & principles. Our long standing history of activism, social justice work, and fighting battles that have needed to be fought. Maybe we can sometimes do a better job of living up to our principles, (and perhaps we should call each other out when we don't), but by and large they provide a pretty good basis for common ground and inclusion.
- One might note that "inclusion" implies a desire by some to be included, and might well involve some change on their part. Presumably, folks come to UU churches because of what we are, and what we offer - we're not selling cereal to the masses, we shouldn't be (IMHO) adding sugar, or putting pretty pictures on the packaging, to better addict kids to our product.
- One might go so far as to say that inclusion does not involve treating each (marginalized) community with a different set of kid gloves, as much as simply creating a space where folks are welcome to be themselves, and perhaps be celebrated for their differences. (Might I add that "we're here, we're <whatever>, deal with it" has been a lot more successful route to the mainstream than "we're marginalized, we demand special treatment" or "we're damaged, treat us with kid gloves." And, when it comes to UUs, we're a denomination born of heresies that got people imprisoned, tortured, and killed - our forebears fought for their right to worship freely, rather than demanding kid glove treatment in the name of emotional safety.) (NOTE: I'm not saying that there is no privilege or injustice in the world, or that we shouldn't be addressing them. I'm suggesting that UU congregations are places that represent, or should represent, common ground & a level playing field - or perhaps a melting pot, if you will.)
- One might also ask what the limits of accommodation & respecting differences should be. There are many Christians, Jews, Muslims, Buddhists, etc. among us. And yes, many of our churches offer Christmas mass - but generally outside of main worship time. Many offer Solstice ceremonies. Fewer organize Seders on Passover, and I've yet to find any that observe the Jewish High Holy Days, nor have we incorporated bowing to Mecca into our worship. We are UUs, and we are individual congregations - we have our values, our ceremonies, our traditions - which, by and large, are neutral & inclusive. Yes, we adjust these over time, but in the moment, we expect those who join us to participate as is - and perhaps these are what we are holding out to the world as something worthy of joining.
- One might also ask about welcoming & including those with whom we don't always agree. Many of our congregations are not all that welcoming of those in the military, or with family members in military, or even those of us who are not always anti-war.
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Anyway, It would be nice to have some discussion of this - outside of "official" channels (e.g., UU World) dominated by proponents of "orthodox" and formal approaches to inclusion. What's the broader spectrum of opinion on such things.